GameDay (80) -- Pens @ Rangers

7:00
Versus



So, that NY Daily News blog from Sunday's game ended up turning into a comments bloodbath. [ Feces ]

The author, John Dellapina, responded with another post on Monday.
[ "Let's just clarify some things." ]

As expected, he calmed down the masses
and reiterated what were his main points in the previous post.

The blog wars during the playoffs is why we are alive.
Just good times.

*******************************************

It is actually hard to imagine a fanbase crying more than the Rangers fans have been.
But Anti-Penguinism has been running wild.

We expect Washington fans to cry.
But the Rangers fans are embarrassing.
They have added to the Hudson River with their tears.

Was the game even filled with that much controversy?

First we had that clown from the NYDailyNews.

Now we have this from [ Some Like ItBlue ]

"...it must be really nice to have the refs and the NHL kissing your ass every time you play because you have Crosby on your team and they desperately want you to succeed because of that fact...."

And also they give us a wonderful breakdown of how each penalty on the Rangers was shady.
No mention of the blown icing call on Crosby, which was obviously the NHL covering their tracks in this league-wide conspiracy.

2. Tyutin for hooking. LOL. Okay.




WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

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TONIGHT

It looks like Letang will be getting scratched for tonight's game.

Whitney is back to defense. [PG]

Now it wouldn't make a lot of sense that Letang is scratched in favor of Whitney.

Common sense says HCMT wants to give Letang a rest or maybe Letang is banged up.

Letang has been solid, Therrien knows that, everyone watching the Penguins all year knows that.

So it maybe a mere coincidence.

If it isn't, Therrien is fixed.


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Repeatedly going after people with whom you disagree will get you in trouble.
It's just an unhealthy way to live.

So we'll give Ken Campbell of [ The Hockey News ] a pass when he ranks Ray Shero
13th overall in his recent GM rankings.

Opinions among hockey people vary wildly on whether or not Shero overpaid at the trade deadline for Marian Hossa, a player he has almost no chance of signing long-term if he wants to keep the rest of his current roster intact. It says here he did not overpay, but even if he did, you have to admire the gumption he showed in committing so much to a rental player. Unless, of course, you believe ownership or other outside forces were driving the bus on this deal. Shero obviously inherited a very good situation, but GMs with bigger egos would have been determined to put their stamp on the team and risk ruining a good thing. Shero has not done that, all the while tweaking things for the better.

The shocking part is that Brett Hull's regime in Dallas and Paul Holmgren in Philadelphia ranked higher.

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:: [ Kukla's Korner ] grabbed some of the transcript from the SportsBusiness Journal about something the NHL will be experimenting with this playoff season.

You know how networks superimpose graphics on the wall behind home plate and crap?
Well, they're gonna be superimposing virtual ads on the glass above the boards during the playoffs as a test.

The NHL is trying to get some revenue dollars.
Let's at least see what it looks like first.

:: Gary Bettman did a Q&A with Blue Jackets fans, answering a question about the relationship between the NHL and ESPN. [ Columbus Dispatch ]

:: Putting broadcasters between the benches is good for the game. [ Toronto Star ]

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Alan Ryder from [ The Globe and Mail ] offers us a lot of era-adjusting statistics to prove that Alex Ovechkin is deserved of the Hart Trophy.

Amongst all the jibbera-joo in that column, the conclusion is somehow met that Ovechkin's current season is better than Gretzky's 92-goal season in 1981-82.

The names Iginla, Lecavalier, and Thornton are thrown around in that column, too,
when talking about potential Hart Trophy candidates among the league's top scorers.

Apparently, rather than having to legitimize that Evgeni Malkin is worthy of at least consideration, it's better just to not mention him at all.

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The Pirates kick off their season tonight.

We wanted to wish our good friend [Where Have You Gone , Andy Van Slyke] good luck on blogging the season, as well as all of the other Pirate bloggers good luck.

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Pens can clinch the division tonight with a victory.

And guess what...
The Rangers aren't even in the playoffs yet.

They almost HAVE TO win this game.

We debated whether or not he was needed.

The Pens haven't been very good at MSG over the last few years.

So you know...



HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


GO PENS

The More Things Change. PENS WIN

[ NHL.COM RECAP ]

10 years ago, if someone would have told you that you would be booing Jaromir Jagr in a Ranger uniform...in Mellon Arena....

First of all, you would say, Mellon What?
Then you would have vomit in your mouth.

Four weeks ago, if someone would have told you Marc-Andre Fleury would be in net and playing out of his mind, you'd be stunned. [Except Loser Chris]

Bottom line:
Things changed.
Things always change.

The Pens are a win away from winning the Atlantic.
Winning out clinches the top seed.
The playoffs begin in 9 days.

God help us all.

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PREGAME

WPXI's pregame made you wish you were emo.
Rich Walsh comes in, wishing it was a Steeler game.

Actual quote while talking with Pierre McGuire:
"Yeah, I'm in the locker room all the time with these guys, and they talk about home-ice advantage. How important is it, Pierre?"

That is the ultimate case of someone trying to act bigger than the sport.
Why not just ask "How important is home-ice advantage?"


Dumbass.

You don't hear Dan Potash saying stuff like that.

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ANTHEM

[Alison]-----------------[Tristian B]


[Dustin]---------------[Greg N]


[Double B]


[No name]--------------------[Matt J]


[Julia]

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FIRST PERIOD

The best thing about games on NBC, and it's something we will be used to in the coming weeks, is the plethora of microphones near ice level.
Someone pulls up on an offensive rush, and the screeching from the skates makes your cat run into a wall.

You yourself wanted to run into a wall when the Rangers capitalized on an early powerplay.
The dreaded shot from the point resulted in a rebound scramble, and Dubinsky banged it home. 1-0.

Dick

The Penguins have still not boxed Dubinsky out.

On the next shift, Hossa made a move in the neutral zone that should be a proper noun.
Crosby and Dupuis almost hooked up for a goal, but no dice.

Finally, after a couple of weeks of the Nation waiting, a semblance of playoff physical play appeared when the Pens forwards started checking everything that moved.

There were so many hits, Casey Kasem stopped by to make a top 40 list.

Creepy

What teams will have to realize is that the bottom two lines will muck it up, and out of nowhere, the pace will change when Crosby or Malkin jump on.
And that's what happened for the Pens first goal.

Instead of dumping it in, Orpik calmly carries it through the neutral zone and gets it to Hossa, who jobs it Sid.
Sid does his business, gets it to Dupuis.
It hits his skate and lands on Hossa's stick. No questions asked.

1-0.

[Jschiff, Esq.]

We're used to Erik Christensen getting that shot and breaking a pane of glass behind the net.

Things got better when Petr Prucha went to the box for roughing.
A new wrinkle in the NHL is that you have to explain every penalty to Brendan Shanahan.

What a baby

The Harlem Globetrotters come on for the power play.

It was just a mud power play.
They don't want to be cute, so they just blast it from the point when there's four Rangers below the dots. It was cleared every time.

Everyone's heart stopped when Crosby went Mach 8 into the Rangers zone to beat out an icing call.
He gets down to the puck and has a hamburger before Rozsival can get there, but it's still an icing.
Sid shows his dismay with a bellowing, WHAT!!!!????!?!? MYEYEARRGGGHHH!!

Bing jamming on the brakes like that means the high-ankle sprain is long gone.

NBC eventually showed the icing.
Maybe one of the worst calls in sports history.

P.S. -- Let the head referee that's right there call it.
His head isn't moving and his vision isn't distorted, as compared to the linesman who's frantically trying to get back there.

Whatev.
Gonchar hit Malone with a great headman pass later, and it resulted in a penalty.

Crosby tried flying into the zone and gets slashed.
That's been a penalty for about 200 years.

No one can hear the whistle blow from all the whining from Brendan Shanajoke.

A delectable 5-on-3 PP ensued.
And once you saw Malkin cocking his stick at the right point, you knew it was just a matter of time.

After Bing almost put one home on the doorstep, it was Malkin Time again.
Unreal laser from the point.

2-1.

[Ryan C]

Don't slash Sidney Crosby.

Bing may have played the final 7 minutes of that first period.
MAF made some key saves to end the first.

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SECOND PERIOD

The Phantom of the Mellon made an appearance early in the second when Hossa got sent off for hooking.
That penalty was killed with relative ease.
Did Sean Avery even play in this game?

The stars aligned after the kill, literally, when Malkin, Bing, and Hossa found themselves on the ice at the same time.

Kennedy took a jobber penalty, and the Pens had to go on the kill again.
This was just karma evening things up from that two-man advantage in the first.
The PK unit gets ready.

A scare or two later, Kennedy was out of the box.
Big saves by MAF there.

Even after two Penguin penalty kills, the Rangers still had the momentum.
But that momentum dissipates when you can't beat a goaltender who is red hot.

Malkin had a rush towards the end of his shift, but he had just worked a 20-hour shift tarring the roof of the license-plate factory and was dead tired.

And then the lightning we missed so much for the past two months appeared when Crosby absolutely flew through the neutral zone, with Dupuis KEEPING PACE.
No dice though.

Things were going swimmingly after that.
And then Malkin got jobbed behind the Rangers net.
Dubinsky got his skate up in Malkin's face.
Malkin knew something was wrong immediately.

He had gotten cut in the face, but he stayed behind in the Rangers zone while play went on.
It wasn't pretty.
The refs don't blow the whistle because they are mad at Malkin for missing the awards ceremony last summer.

Bing's line came on and wreaked havoc.
Sydor eventually drew a penalty.

Sickeningly, and it was done with humor, NBC had to remind you when they came back from commercial to change your Gillette razor blades.
100% classless.

Next thing you know, NBC will broadcast a game where the Capitals are fighting for their playoff lives, and it will be sponsored by AIDS research.

At the tail end of the period, Jordan Staal gets the job done and draws a penalty.

Most of the power play disappears with no sign of offense.
Everyone is stunned about Malkin and can't get anything going.
Things get a little feisty, so the Pens have to bring in the van.

Side-note blog

[Donnie S.] sent this in.

Apparently this is a van on the campus of CMU:

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THIRD PERIOD

As the third period is about to start,
We get a live update on the "Zurich Open," so that some A-hole in a country club somewhere can watch Lee Trevino sink a putt.

At the start of the third, we see Malkin smiling back on the ice.
Dubinsky came over and expressed his concern.
But then the puck dropped.

The Pens survived an early-period scare when Rozsival feathered it through the crease, but it ended up doing nothing.

Sidney Crosby got high sticked by Pedro Gomez.
He threw his head back, but that is what most people do when they get hit in the face.

We guess some people didn't think so...

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If you want to get really mad,
meet our new enemy.


[Thanks to Josh R for finding this]

John writes for the Blueshirts Blog.
In his latest blog, titled Jagr Failed Pens Acting Class...

He blast Sidney Crosby.
Okay whatev.

But then he says this:

But even more mystifying is how Jaromir Jagr could have begun his career in Pittsburgh, developed into a superstar here and never learned the diving and face-clutching and horrified equipment shedding that has been part and parcel of Pens hockey ever since Mario Lemieux decided to shame the league into enforcing its obstruction penalties by embarrassing all officials who didn’t do so.

WOW

Rather than have a rebuttal for this Ranger fanboy,
we'll just say this:

He has a comments section.
Go have a fun time.

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Anyways...
The powerplay didn't result in anything.

After some jobbing, Father Time was trying to find his car keys.
Around that same time, Marty Straka heads to the penalty box.
A weight machine falls on him and he doesn't return for the rest of the game.

A potentially game-changing power play was on the way.

The story of the power play was the Pens finally getting a shot.
A second later, that was upstaged by a surreal save by Lundqvist.
The power play was gone again.

With 6:30 left, it was still tense times because the Rangers were one sick pass and shot away from tying this game up.

And a test of mettle came when Kris Letang takes his first penalty since the 8th-grade picnic.

It was here among 17,000 screaming Mellon Arena fanatics that the Pittsburgh Penguins found out who they were.

The power play was here and gone.
And there was 3:00 left.

After some scares, there was one minute left.
Why the Rangers didn't take a time-out there, no one knows.

But it was moot.
A demoralizing final nail into the coffin makes it 3-1.

Hossa worked down deep and got it back to the point, which was open all game.
Scuderi does his job, gets it to the net.
Lundqvist wanted to move the puck along, but he couldn't grasp the puck.
No one froze it, and Talbot snuck in to put it home.

Ranger fans =Stunned

The Rangers take a penalty right after that.

Game.

STATS

• Malkin: 1G
• Hossa: 1G
• Bing: 2A
• MAF: 26 saves
  

MISCELLANEOUS

• Really give it up for Ryan Whitney. Most people would purposely not try at the forward position to show it's not their forte. Whitney is doing the job.
• The USS Hal Gill was solid, despite HCMT breaking up the Gill/Letang pairing.
  
• The Rangers are annoying.
• Pierre McGuire needs to get hit by a puck.
• Pens can win the divsion Monday night.
  
• First place in East.
• Pens are undefeated in the Mellon in March.
• NBC's audio is unreal.
• Hossa.
  

GameDay (79) -- Rangers @ Pens

12:30
NBC



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One of the few reasons we wake up before our usual 2:00 in the afternoon.


:: Hossa is all systems go. [ Trib ]

[Rob S.]


Curiously enough, this home-and-home series with the Rangers
didn't look like a big deal when the schedule came out this past summer.

For the duration of this season, it's been Devils, Devils, Devils.

Out of nowhere in the past month, the Rangers have stopped crapping on themselves and starting fulfilling expectations all the talking heads gave them in the preseason.

These next two games will go a long way in determining if we can cross off the Rangers on that list you're making of teams you don't want to play in the playoffs.

Come to think of it, we wouldn't even want to play Tampa in the playoffs,
so whatev.

If you're going to the game today,
you might want to make a last-minute sign.

Client 16?

Remember that hooker thing with the New York Governor last month?
No?
Well, Sean Avery remembers. [Deadspin] via [700 Level] via [Dailynews]

"Avery, 27, a trash-talking enforcer who has dated a string of models and actresses, is listed as a $500 client of brothel Maison de L'Amour."

There is justice in the world.

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Ummmm...

The biggest question of the week.
Does Malkin have pants on in this photo?

The smile on his face says no.
No one else being in his vicinity says no.

100 bucks that Tim Benz is the only other person in the room.

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The bigger story today is the Penguins' opportunity to sit alone
atop the Eastern Conference in first place.

Those beautiful Maple Leafs, out of the playoffs, jobbed the Habs [ 4-2 on Saturday night. ]
The Pens and Habs will have both played 79 games by Sunday night.

Even better, captain Saku Koviu is done for 4 weeks. [All Habs]

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And if you want to talk about insanity,
look at the race for, yes, the Southeast Division.



With both teams having three games remaining,
Carolina has 90 points and Washington has 88.

All eyes will be on Washington Tuesday night.
Carolina's coming to town.

Carolina will hold the head-to-head tiebreaker, no matter what.

Nicklas Backstrom = Stunned

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The West playoff race is out of its mind.

Three teams are now tied for the final spot, after the Oilers continued their magical mystery tour with a win over the Flames on Saturday night.



Nashville would be in if the season ended today.
The Oilers have two games left, the Canucks and Preds have four.

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Someone brought it up in CBlog that this could be JJ's last game in Mellon Arena.



Some people boo. Some people don't.
Some people put him in photoshops.
Some people thank him for those two Cups.



Mario Lemieux

Regular Season:
950 Games Played
690 Goals
1,033 Assists
1,723 Points

Playoffs:
107 Games Played
76 Goals
96 Assists
172 Points

Jaromir Jagr

Regular Season:
1,268 Games Played
641 Goals
950Assists
1,591 Points

Playoffs:
159 Games Played
72 Goals
94 Assists
166 Points

Jagr has about 300 games on Lemieux,
but it will still be a sad day if Jagr eclipses Lemieux's totals.

By the way, we don't know what the statute of limitations is,
but Lemieux still has a [ Yahoo player page ]

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Everyone was running wild on Saturday,
frantically trying to figure out why that Avalanche/Pens game on January 23, 1997 was a big deal.

Was it the game Joe Mullen scored his 500th career goal?
Was it the last meeting of Mario Lemieux and Patrick Roy?
No and no.

We found [ this article ] written by some clown at The Virginia Pilot on the day of the game.
It was a Thursday night.

The Avs came in with the best record in the NHL.
And they were the defending Cup champs.

There were also reports from e-mailers that Paul Devorski jobbed the Pens in overtime.

[ USA Today ] confirms the outcome:

Valeri Kamensky scored at 3:55 of overtime, giving the Colorado
Avalanche a 4-3 victory and ending the 14-game unbeaten streak
of the Pittsburgh Penguins, who played without injured superstar
Mario Lemieux.

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:: Voting for the Mike Lange Tournament of Quotes is up and running
at [ Going Five Hole]

Our horse is
"Lord Stanley, Lord Stanley Bring Me The Brandy."

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:: The [Faceoff Factor] group set the facts straight on MAF.


[Scott A]

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Someone asked for this:



CALL TO ARMS

We aren't into ourselves, but we are grasping at the chance
that someone out there downloads pics we put up top.

If you have done it, does anyone have the SHEROES photoshop
of all the Pens as the cast of Heroes?
If so, please send it in.

Our computers reach a certain level of gay-cruise pics before it starts deleting other ones.

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Go Pens

OMG You Killed Hossa, You Bastards

[Jason G]


:: Hossa is going to be fine, but it just seemed like a good title for the post,
see above. [PG]

"Marian appears to be OK," general manager Ray Shero said. "Knock on wood."

*Given the collective erection Pens fans have going into the playoffs, that should be easy.*

You have a better chance of finding out secrets from Area 51
than you do of knowing what's wrong with Hossa.

:: Around 4,400 Penguin playoff tickets sold out in about 11 minutes today. [PittsburghPenguins.com]

85% were sold on line.

You're welcome

Also from [Penguins.com], the Islanders game last night was second most-watched Penguins in FSN history.

The list:

1. Dec. 27, 2000 vs. Toronto, 15.9

2. March 27, 2008 vs. NY Islanders, 10.7

3. March 18, 2007 vs. Ottawa, 9.7

4. January 23, 1997 vs. Colorado, 9.4????????

5. January 10, 2008 at Tampa Bay 9.28

Why in the hell was that Colorado game in 97 a big deal?

Thinking about it now, is that number for the Islanders game big because of Home Ice and the NHL packages around the country?

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Aftermath

[Steve P]

[On the Islanders Beat] has a solid peace on the Islanders rebuilding plan.
Other than that, the Islanders suck.

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Happy trails:

Mick McGeough

He is retiring at the end of the season. [National Post]

"He's kind of like the villain in All-Star Wrestling. The kind of guy the fans love to hate," said Edmonton coach Craig MacTavish, who was once fined $ 10,000 for describing McGeough's work as " spastic" and " retarded."

One of the things thats unites all hockey fans is the chances are Mick McGeough screwed all of our teams at one point or another.


See the [Fire Mick McGeough] petition for that.



Vintage.

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Buffalo pretty much blew their whole season.[DieByTheBlade]
They blow a two-goal lead for the second time in a week. And lose in OT.


Jokes


Speaking of jokes, the Devils finally won. [Interchangeable Parts]
Mike Knuble tied if for the Flyers late, so both teams get a point.


Game


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The Sharks clinched the Pacific Division with a win over the Ducks.[Battle of California]

Stunned

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In other interesting [Battle Of California] news.

Check out what someone left in a year old comments sections about Brad May.

"I'm a lawyer in Phoenix trying to collect a judgment my client obtained against the 'gutless puke of a thug' Brad May when May, drunk, punched my client, a uniformed sheriff's deputy, at a Scottsdale, Arizona nightclub, in 2002.

May is dodging the judgment (only about $30,000), and claims to be a resident of Canada. Does anybody know if he actually lives in Anaheim? Does he still do his golf tournament in Phoenix? Any information on May's "residency" would be most appreciated.

Dan Treon dbt@treonshook.com"

We won't rest until one day Edgar Synder joins c-blog

Beast

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:: We missed the Dr. Visit last night. But Mirtle had a good time in Pittsburgh. [Mirtle]

Kudos to Seth at [Empty Netters] for playing host to Mirtle.



*Just a note, Seth is not black nor does he look like Morgan Freeman.

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:: Is Double J heading to Russia? Yeah that might be a distracting. [BlueShirtBlulletin]

[Andy]

:: ESPN and the NHL might be done for good. [Fanhouse]


:: Rob Ray hates fans. [Going Five Hole]



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The USS Hal Gill sails on.


[Greg V]


Go Pens

Et Tu, Ruutu? PENS WIN.

[ NHL.COM RECAP ]

It seems like just yesterday the Islanders were dancing around after Al Albour came out of retirement to coach them to a win over the Pens.

--Flashback--

What do these pictures have in common?
They both will be dead before you know it.
WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

--End Flashback--

Funny how things worked out.

Despite several assassination attempts on Marian Hossa, the Penguins finally beat Wade Dubielewicz, thanks to a virtuoso three-point performance by Jarkko Ruutu.

It is a shame the Hossa injury scares will be the main concern.
(Hossa is day-to-day and should be fine.)

Jarrko Ruutu, BGL, and Max Talbot played as good as a line could play.

Ruutu for Mayor.

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ANTHEM


-- 412 --


-- Vinnie --------- Zlancia --


-- captain dummy ---------- Jannah J --


-- Carrie --


-- Mark M --

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FIRST PERIOD

Right off the top of the broadcast we get hit by a "Steel City Line" graphic.
What a disaster.

The Islanders injury woes have been documented already.
But another wrinkle for them, is that they are trying to get their farm team into the playoffs.

They have been sending players back and forth in the attempt.
Included in those players is backup goalie Joey McDonald.

With McDonald down, the Islanders turned to some joke named Mike Mole,
who plays for their ECHL team.

So what happens two minutes into the game?
Dubielewicz gets ran over.
If Ted Nolan could feel, he would have been worried.
But Dubes gets up.

Tonight was about Hossa-Crosby-Dupuis. They gOt some things going.
Crosby and Hossa seem to have a good connection.
But this isn't a dating show, so who even knows what that means.

Crosby starts right where he left off and draws a penalty.

Lord Therrien responds by putting out four forwards on the powerplay.
It had to be done.
The powerplay doesn't get anything going, but at one point, it will.
And your balls will fall off.

Right after the powerplay, Ruutu and BGL come out.
They job around with Talbot for awhile.

Talbot goes to the bench for a change, and Maklin flies in, but gets knocked off the puck.
Ruutu and BGL follow up. Ruutu gets the puck to him.
BGL runs some solid interference.
Malkin roofs it. 1-0

All seems to be going well.
Ryan Whitney gets a chance on a nice setup from JFK, but can't finish.
The Islanders then come out of nowhere.
The puck gets batted around at center ice.
Josef Vasicek get the puck and turns into Mike Bossy.
He sneaks one past MAF.
1-1

The goal stunned the world and gave the Islanders life.
With under a minute to play, the Isles go nuts.
Josef Vasicek goes nuts again. He makes a great pass to Bill Guerin.
But MAF stands tall as time expires.

[SteelCity 8771]

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SECOND PERIOD

It didn't start out well for Marian Hossa, and it would get worse.
Ted Nolan apparently put a price on Hossa's head to start the second.

[Josh B]

Less than a minute into the second, some dude tries to job him.
Hossa punches him in the face and gets a penalty.

The Pens kill it.
Nothing really goes on, until Ruutu takes a roughing penalty.
Fox Sports refuses to show it or say what happened.
Good times.

Towards the end of the kill, the Pens spring Hossa on a breakaway,
but the puck bounces on him.

Bing gets on and does a special move where he flips the puck over a defender.
He walks in on Dubie, but no dice.

66 buries it.
Maybe if they would have shown the replay 26 more times,
history may have changed and he would've buried it.

And then it happened.....

Hossa was flying down the ice, and some A-hole hip checks him. His knees go flying in the air.
All you see is Sykora go nuts and drop the gloves.
What a stand-up guy Sykora is.

FSN actually shows the replay, and the suicide-prevention hotline prepares for an influx of calls.
To make matters worse, Hossa goes straight to the locker room.

barf

The ensuing powerplay means nothing.
But thankfully as we come back from a commercial, Hoss is sitting on the bench.
As the focus returns to the game, the Isles get away with a too many men on the ice call.

[Sarah L]

The Pens wouldn't be as lucky, as they, too, get called for t0o many men.
Lord Therrien makes Ryan Whiteny serve it because he hates his face.

And then it was the Jarkko Ruutu Show. He hustled to a puck and walked in on a partial breakaway. He made a slight little move on Dubie, and then went around the net and stuffed a hugggggggeeeeeee goal home.

2-1

What can't you say about Ruutu?
The last two weeks he has been everywhere.

[Kevin S.]

The rest of the second dragged on.
So sick of the Islanders.

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Cotton Candy HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

[Mark M]

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

THIRD PERIOD

[Hutch]

In the third period it was clear that the Islanders number-one goal was to injure someone.
Four minutes in, they got what they wanted.
Sean Bergenheim nails Hossa from behind.

It is hard to say if it was on purpose or not.
Either way it looked like it hurt.
Hossa was dazed and confused as he skated to the locker room.

All hell broke loose as Hossa lay face down. Orpik was trying to kill someone.

**Bergenheim leaves the ice.
We applaud the fans for not throwing anything at him as he walked through the tunnel.
We would have.

Father Time arrives just in time.

The USS Hal Gill breaks up a pass. Ruutu flips it to BGL.
A rare breakaway for BGL, and he buries it.

3-1

After that goal, the Penguins nearly break the game wide open as Malkin gets rejected by Dubie.

The rest of the third period was either spent on worrying about Hossa, or plotting ways to kick Ted Nolan in the balls.

Either way the message had been sent.
Fleury closed the door late.

Finally done with the Isles.

Game.
[Christopher M]

STATS

• Malkin: 1G
• BGL: 1G
• Ruutu: 1G, 2A

MISCELLANEOUS

• Hossa is fine.
• The USS Hal Gil is a beast.
• One bright spot for the Isles -- Kyle Okposo is going to be a really good player.
• Magic number for the division is now 4 or 5. We don't know what the tiebreaker is.

FIRST PLACE IN THE CONFERENCE, JACK

GameDay (78) -- Islanders @ Pens

7:30

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

For the first time since high school in that weird kid's basement, you feel comfortable saying you want to smoke a Dubie tonight.

The Islanders squeaked into the playoffs last season on the last day.
That won't be happening this year.

**We had a photoshop of Guerin coming out of a storm cellar, but can't find it.*
Can somebody resend it?

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Finally, Crosby and Hossa will see time on the same line tonight.
It's been a long time coming.

The MAFer will be in goal tonight, although Ryan Whitney is probably his backup.

Coach Therrien can't hear Whitney or anyone else complaining about his coaching decisions.
He's too busy propelling the team into the top position in the East.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Guaranteed Victory

All Hands On Deck

What a huge night.
Something no one thought would ever occur........



"Sudden Death," will no longer be the only movie to ever be shot at the Mellon.

[She's Out of My League] will be filming during tonight's game or something. [PG]

It stars some guy no one has ever heard of, and some semi-attractive chick.

Hopefully that dress didn't make the trip.

Sudden Death grossed like 50 bucks.
This movie already sucks, and it hasn't been made.
However, if the filmmakers know what's good, Gary Roberts gets a cameo. Maybe even 66.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

February 26, 2008


Marian Hossa comes to Pittsburgh in the Pascal Dupuis trade,
immediately being seen as Sid's winger.

Unfortunately, that hasn't actually been seen yet.
That changes tonight at the Mellon when the Islanders come to town.


Sid will be playing in his first home game since January 18th.

Sid and Pascal Dupuis are both suiting up for the game that will show Monday's atrocity on Long Island was a fluke. [ TSN ]



:: The transcript of a Jordan Staal conference call, y'all. [ Kukla's ]

:: The Pens are third in TSN's latest power rankings. [ TSN ]


-- There were rumors floating around that Mark Eaton could be back for the East Finals if the Pens could get there.
Anyone hear anything about this?

::KDKA interviewed Gary Roberts. [KDKA]
He said he skated yesterday.
And then the camera melted.


[Eric H]

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

In honor of March Madness,
[ Going Five Hole ] is unleashing the "Mike Lange Tournament of Quotes."


[Click to enlarge]

Voting begins Thursday night, midnight.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

AFTERMATH



Coach Brent Sutter didn't have a whole lot to say following the game.
There wasn't anything worthy of quoting, just the cliche "you need to score to win."

The good people over at [ Interchangeable Parts ] recapped the game.
Solid read if the Devils game is still fresh in your mind.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Media Personality Blog


Ross the Boss updated his synopsis of the Pens at [ Yahoo ]

The Penguins got a taste of success by getting into the playoffs last spring. Reality set in during a first-round blowout at the hands of eventual conference champ Ottawa, however. The experience is valuable, and with another year of maturity for the young stars, the possibility going deep and even winning the East is there.

He didn't even acknowledge that a correction was made.

***********************************

This next guy makes Ross McKeon look like a god.


This is Dan Le Betard, and he is a jackass.

You may not recognize him, since you can't really make out his face when he's always in the shadows of ESPN's A-list commentators.

Then again, you may notice him as that stain in your underpants
when you're too busy for that one last solid wipe.

He's some jobber who writes for The Miami Herald.
He's the classic case of somebody kissing ass to get on TV.

He filled in for Mike Wilbon on "Pardon The Interruption" on Tuesday.
They showed footage of Patrick Roy's son in that fight.

Tony Kornheiser called the incident pure savagery.
Eventually, Dan Le Baturd called the game of hockey itself savagery.


Kornheiser responded by saying, "Well, uh, that's taking it a little far."

There's no use going after this guy. He's really not worth it.
Nobody likes him. You can tell Kornheiser wants to jump out of a window.

But don't let that stop you from sending, "Dan Le Baturd, you are a douche"
to his e-mail address, like we've done 20 times already.

dlebatard@miamiherald.com

If you have Gmail, don't expect a reply,
since Google recently unveiled their new Homo Mail filter.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

:: James Duthie at [ TSN ] examines the effect of making and missing the playoffs on franchises.

:: Out of the 12 lowest payroll teams,
the Sharks and Pens are the only two headed for the playoffs. [ USA Today ]

:: The tales of hockey journalists on the move. [ Globe and Mail ]


The real journalist on the move?
[Dr. James Mirtle]

He'll be visiting the Mellon tonight for the game.


::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::


They are the next team in the periscope of the USS and the Pens.
-- A list of 10 reasons why they have clinched a playoff spot. [ Montreal Gazette ]
Worth the time to check out a threat to the Pens.

It's looking better for their arena deal. [ TSN ]

[The Battle of Alberta] chimes in, as does [Covered in Oil]

Solid stuff.


Bruins beast Marc Savard was cross-checked by Montreal's Steve Begin and broke a bone in his back. [ Boston Herald ]
There's no threat of spinal-cord injury, thank God.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

[ NHL STANDINGS ]

Eliminated:




::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::



Of course, this is given out endearingly sometimes.
And this is one of those instances.

In an article regarding how much the Kings are "teh suck,"
Ian Winwood from [ The Guardian ] had this to say:

With just 30 wins this season, the LA Kings have been playing meaningless hockey since before the onset of winter. This in itself is not necessarily a problem; the Toronto Maple Leafs have been playing meaningless hockey for about 41 years and people still care about them.

SLAM

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Speaking of jobbers...

We got wind that our old friend [Acid Joke] calls [XM Home Ice]
almost everyday during the NHL Live hour ( 12 - 2 )

The show is on XM radio and the NHL Network.
The two hosts, E.J Hradek and Don La Greca seem to enjoy her,
which could be setting them up for a prank call.

We didn't think people in North Carolina could afford to make long-distance calls like that.


Picture: Acid Queen calling NHL Live outside of her house.


Side note:

Other than letting Carolina Hurricane fans talk on their airwaves,
XM Home Ice is as solid as it gets.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Sick photoshop:

[Ed H]


:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

And lastly.

March 27, 1991.

The Penguins clinched their first division title ever by beating the Red Wings.

Go Pens

A Flower is Blossoming. PENS WIN.

[ NHL.com RECAP ]


Sometime in the near future, games like the one against the Islanders won't happen anymore.
Games like that are mere reminders of the growing pains of a young team.

Games like this one are suggestions of the possible dominance that could develop in future years.

This season, the Pens have shown they can win back-and-forth shootouts,
4-3 jobber games, 1-0 trap games with an empty-netter for insurance.

Last year, the thought of catching the Devils was a pipe dream that everyone had fun with.
This year it has become a real.

The Pens proved in this game that they can play the Devils system.
In that system, both teams wait for their chances.
The team with the higher-skilled players will win.

MAF stared Marty Brodeur right in the eyes, and made a huge statement.




All we could ask for is a shot at the playoffs.
And now we're in.

After the dark ages, we'll never take that for granted again.
It's good to be back.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Anthem

[Spess]


[Brett]

[Pat S]


[Jack G]

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

FIRST PERIOD

Nice of Devils fans to show up for this one.
[Josh Y]

The early moments were gonna dictate what kind of game this was gonna be.
And what happens? Malone gets a breakaway.

If he scores there, it would have been so demoralizing for the Devils.
But it ended up happening a couple minutes later anyway.

The Pens went on the PP, and Malone found a soft spot in the high slot.
Ryan Whitney got it to him. One-timer.
1-0.

Stunned
[Spess]

The comparisons to Kevin Stevens have been raining down on Malone this season.
Stemming from that huge shortie he scored in Calgary, Ryan Malone has scored some big momentum-changing and pace-setting goals this season.
That's bound to happen when you knock home 25-some pucks.

A lot of nothingness followed that goal.
We don't have footage to confirm, but the black kid from Ghostwriter may have played a shift on the Pens fourth line.

What a TV show

As the period winded down, stuff started happening.
Staal blocked a shot with his life, and things were getting chippy.

Letang led a rush to the Devils zone and caused chaos when he simply got it on net.
Talbot gets pwned trying to bang in the rebound.
Apparently, you can do the British Bulldog's finishing move on someone if they're trying to score.

Back in the Pens end, it looks like Jamie Langenjoker can charge Jordan Staal when he doesn't even have the puck.
But, look out, Talbot messes up a Devil's lipstick and goes to the box for high-sticking.

A solid PK to cap off a solid period, all the way around.
Orpik and Zubrus were jobbing at the end and headed to the box.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

SECOND PERIOD

The second period started with 4-on-4 action, which is always a good time.
Nobody got anything going, though.

Errey and Steiggy noticed that the Pens were losing pucks in the air because it blended in with the dark-colored seats at The Rock.
They suggested painting the seats yellow.
Pensblog suggests the Devils try to get people to actually come to games.

If you had been complaining about penalties against the Pens, all that went out the window when Letang lost his stick.

He pushes a Devils jobber into Fleury. Fleury flops around, and the Devils score.
The referee was immediately washing it out.

Some people say it is a horrible goal, some people say it's a good goal.
You always watch the player without a stick try to interfere and push people since that's his only way to get stuff done.

The Devils fans and Brent Sutter take over Zamboni duties and resurface the ice with their tears.

The look on that dude's face is why the Devils are annoying.

How soon they all forget how badly the referees jobbed the Pens in that game early in the season.

Frustration was mounting for the Devils, which is definitely the definition of karma.
It just feels so good to see it.
FSN went to a commercial break, but it looked like at one point, John Madden was complaining to the refs he got held.

John Madden complaining about holding is like Joey Fatone complaining about making out with men.

boom

The Devils continue the crap as Kelly Clarkson sticks the butt-end of his stick into Marian Hossa's brain.
Clarkson is a boobjob.
The refs didn't see it.

The bigger joke was the even-up call from that goalie-interference play.
Speaking of, wait a minute. Why didn't the Devils get a penalty for that?

Anyway, Malone went to the box on what had to be one of the worst calls of the season.
But it happened right in front on the Devils bench.
The Pens had to weather the storm, which you could name Hurricane Homo.

And the second period ended with the Pens still up 1-0.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

THIRD PERIOD

At the beginning of the third, there were some things that still needed answering.
-- When would Jay Pandolfo score?
-- Would the Pens clinch a playoff berth?
-- If a tree fell in Prudential Arena, would anyone hear it?

Another meaningless Devils power play went to the wayside after BGL jobbed someone.

Their best chance came right after the penalty expired.
The USS Hal Hill changed its heading to thwart a centering pass.
The puck got over him to Langenjoke, who Flower stopped easily.
Malone came in and launched Langenjoke about 100 feet into the boards.

Right off the next whistle, Gionta gets a golden chance, but MAF stones him.
The USS Hal Gill clears up the water in front of MAF.

And then a little after that, an old friend comes to town when the Devils get caught with too many men.

Give it up for the linesman who caught it.
Ruutu loved it.

That Pens powerplay was mud, mainly because they weren't ready for the Devils' PK unit to lay on the pressure.

As the third period reached the homestretch, it was simply Fleury Time.
And if you felt really comfortable watching him set up for shots, you were not alone.

Save...after save...save...
all brought to you by Ford, obviously.

Therrien sensed the Devils were tired, and he throws Connor James out there while the Pens were heavily petting a 1-0 lead.
He was fast as balls on that shift, which is why he was out there.

It was all Devils for the last 10 minutes of this game.
The Devils are a solid team. You can come to expect that, at least.

Father time strolls in.

A couple heart-stoppages later, the Devils were pulling Marty for the extra attacker.
Off the faceoff, the Devils just run over Fleury. No call, as the puck finds it way to Hossa.
Hossa played one of the best defensive games you'll want to see from a forward.
He goes top shelf on the empty net.
2-0.

[Brett]

It must be demoralizing to be a member of the home team, still playing, while all your fans turn their backs on you to leave you wallowing in your sorrows.

Thanks to Isaac Newton's laws of gravity, we know we can't be hit by your tears from up here in first place.

Game.

STATS

• MAF: 30 Saves
• Malone: 1G
• Hossa: 1G
  

MISCELLANEOUS

• Playoooooooooffffffffffssssssss..WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
  
• To get a sense of the atmosphere in The Rock, fans freely walk up and down the aisles during action. At the Mellon, you are shot for that.
• These little jabs at officiating will mean nothing in two weeks.
• 4 points up on the Devils with five games to play.
• Scuds is as solid as it gets.
• Ryan Whitney did play on the fourth line. Let's just move on.
• Are the Devils going to sellout their playoff games?
  

::::::::::::::

Photoshops

Do you Believe----Eric M
John Madden----Ed$
USS Hal Gill and Stevie Wonder-- Eric H
Devils kid crying--- CoffeyTalk

::::::::::::::::


Clinched.
This is D-Copp, signing off.

GameDay (77) -- Pens @ Devils

7:00
boobs

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

In what is probably the biggest game since Saturday,
The Pens head to New Jersey for a HUGE battle with the Devils.

HUGE.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Random Pens fan:
Hey, Dupuis, you don't need to still be with your wife, joke!
We have to win this game against the Devils!!!1!!1

Dupuis:
Wow, maybe the Pens shouldn't have blown that game against the Avalanche earlier this season, or maybe they should have actually tried to play hockey against San Jose.
You wouldn't need these points now.


plow

Pascal Dupuis is still with his wife down in Atlanta, spending time with his newborn child.

Having him and Sid out of the lineup really taints the confidence factor you would have
going into a huge tilt against New Jersey.

But it's still huge.

And, honestly, if you want a barometer on where MAF currently is situated
among NHL elite goaltenders, tonight is the night.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

OUR VERY OWN CALL TO ARMS

We're sending out that post we did on how much of a bargain Sykora was,
to every news source imaginable.

We've never done that, but it has to come to light,
since most news sources can't even get something as simple as last year's playoff season correct.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Speaking of which...

The e-mails came pouring in this afternoon (all 5 of them) that our buddy Ross McKeon over at [ Yahoo NHL ] crapped the bed.

In his synopsis on why the Penguins are currently 5th in his power rankings, he had this to say:

The Penguins got a taste of success not only getting into the playoffs last spring but winning a round, too. Reality set in during a second-round blowout. The experience is valuable, and with another year of maturity for the young stars, the possibility of winning the East is there.


We got to the second round with your daughter.

We had to backtrack and figure out why we like jobbing this guy.
He's just there, a guy who worked up the ranks to earn a living writing about hockey.
We liked him earlier in the year because he kept knocking out great columns.

But it turned sour when, on one fateful day, he penned a column about which city
is most deserving of the "HockeyTown" moniker instead of Detroit.
And he didn't mention Pittsburgh.

And then he probably ranked the Pens too low in his Power Rankings
on the same day someone high-fived us with a fistful of turd.
And the rest was history.

Speaking of being history...


2

The Pens aren't in the playoffs yet.

Wade Dubielewicz. PENS LOSE

[ NHL.COM Recap ]


If this game was NHL '95 for Sega Genesis,
you would have accidentally bumped your Genesis hoping for a reset.

You can look for answers.
But games like this are better off buried away somewhere and forgotten about it.

As Michel Therrien said after the game:

"It was an emotional game last game. Maybe that was one of the reasons why we were flat. It's unacceptable. Excuses are for losers."

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Anthem

--Sean from [Going Five Hole]--

--Jeff H--

--410--

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

FIRST PERIOD

Right out of the gates the Islanders junior varsity team comes out flying.
The first shot on Conkblock nearly goes in.
Not a good sign.

The Pens have had a well documented problem with injuries this year.
But the Islanders are destroyed.
They hoped to get Mike Comrie back, but he had the flu.
Rumor has it, he is still heartbroken.

The Pens were able to match the Isles energy in the early moments.
Some good action for about two minutes.
Some dude from the Isles high sticks someone.

We're not sure, but as the Versus broadcast had the camera on Michel Therrien, he dropped seven F Bombs in Ted Nolan's general direction.

Powerplayblog for that high stick.
Ryan Whitney forgets he plays defense.
He crosses to the blue line, crosses the left circle, goes behind the net.
The Isles steal the puck with ease and get it up to Richard Park.

Park winds up.

1-0

Richard Park drinks his own pee.

Giving up a shorthanded goal for the first goal of the game is never good.
But it turned out OK, as seconds later the second powerplay unit struck.
Dubielewicz made his only mistake of the night.
Petr Sykora's shot is nasty.

1-1.......

But hold the phone.

The ref didn't see the puck go in, because he was picking his balls.
He wastes a long-distance call to the War Room. It's a goal.

[J.S.]

After that, things get rough.
Talbot blows some joke up, and a little scrum develops.

[Kyle Jackson]

The Islanders continue to pepper Conk.
They get a 19-on-1 with Scuds as the only guy back.
Conk stands his ground with a nice kicksave.

The Isles get a powerplay after Ruutu takes a penalty.
The Pens kill it and escape to the locker room.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::
SECOND PERIOD

We have to admit -- the Versus broadcast wasn't too bad.
Brian Engblom was decent.
But the sideline reporter guy was a mess.
He over-extended several interviews while play was going on.
Dan Potash doesn't make those mistakes.

Beast

As the second period gets going, it becomes clear that the Islanders want to win for some reason.
Bill Guerin hits the post.
Moments later he doesn't make the same mistake again.
He gets a pass from some guy who was probably playing at Bill's Dek Hockey last week.

Top shelf.

2-1

Despite the game being 2-1, it felt 7-1.
The Islanders shutdown everything.
They got a powerplay after Sykora slashed someone.

The Isles waste no time. They sink the USS Hal Gill.
The Pens looked bewildered on the penalty kill.
Guerin gets another solid shot on net.
Sean Bergenheim puts a rebound home. 3-1

The Refs feel bad for the Pens later on in the period and give them a powerplay.
But it didn't matter.

Three shots in the second period.
Ouch.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

THIRD PERIOD

You need to know one thing about the third period.

[321 Lincoln]




Game.

STATS:

• Joke

MISCELLANEOUS

• Wade Dubielewicz owns our life. He shut the door in the third.
• Scuds was back, not bad, all things considered.
• Don't blast Conklin, we wouldn't be here without him.
• Dupuis = MVP?
• The USS Hal Gill will sail again.
• Seven defensemen? Hmmmmmm...
  
• If you think this game is disappointing, just wait. There will be some coming up that will hurt much worse.
• Crosby told versus he is out tomorrow.
  
• Biggest game of the season coming up.
• Boobs.

One final note about the Nassau Coliseum.
We always make fun of it.
But if you like looking at pictures, the ones taken at the Nassau Coliseum are the best, hands down.
Check them out.

[Yahoo Pictures]

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::


2

GameDay (76) -- Pens @ Islanders

Nassau Coliseum



7:00

VERSUS

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Crosby's not playing yet. Take your effin time dude.

Dupuis has flown down to Atlanta to be with his wife for the birth of their third child.

Scuderi is back, to play in the arena where he got hurt.
HCMT is running 7 D-men tonight.

And Conks is getting the start in the arena where he stopped like 80 shots a couple weeks ago.

*********************************

But honestly, all of that is moot.

Two years ago at this time, Crosby had yet to score his 100th point in the NHL
and the Pens were nowhere near the playoffs for the 4th consecutive season.

"Yeah, boohoo, the Pens haven't made it into the playoffs 4 times in the last 18 years,"
says a Blue Jackets fan.

We made it though the dark ages of the early '00s, and the Penguins will be in the playoffs for the second consecutive year if they get a win tonight.

Raise an extra drink into the sky if the Pens are ahead when that final horn sounds.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Ooh, the nerve of the Penguins front office:

Announcing that tickets for home games 1 and 2 of the playoffs go on sale
this Friday at 10:00 a.m. [ Penguins Website ]

D-Copp refuses to put money aside for tickets until that number is round.


2

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

By the way, WTF...it's Game 76.
Where'd the season go?

Fear and Loathing in the NHL

This week is big.
Islanders, Devils, Islanders, Rangers, Rangers by next Monday night.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

:: Sid may be in the lineup tonight against the Islanders. [ PG ]
Take your time dude.


:: This one hurts.
Gary Roberts has a setback. [PG]

Roberts, who hasn't played since breaking his leg and getting a high ankle sprain when Buffalo center Tim Connolly fell on him Dec. 29, aggravated his ankle problem when he stumbled while skating at Madison Square Garden in New York Tuesday.

He has stopped skating and is not expected to get back on the ice until at least mid-week.

:: John Buccigross had some dandies in his recent column on [ ESPN.com ]

He discusses the decisions facing Ray Shero this offseason in relation to Malkin.
Bucci also reminds us that there are 387 Armstrong and 587 Christensens out there.

:: The Pens are scary good. [ ESPN Fantasy ]

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

AFTERMATH



We found this at [ Fire & Ice ] via [ Kukla's ]

“You’re tied 1-1 in a hockey game and you give up a terrible shorthanded goal from a 3-on-1 break from the hash marks in their zone,” coach Brent Sutter said.

“I really thought that changed the complexion of the game and from that point on we made a lot of mental mistakes.
We had a lot of breakdowns.
We weren’t very strong between the ears for the rest of the game.”


:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Nicknameblog



No offense to the person who spent 10 minutes coming up with the "Steel City Line," but that has got to go.
The reasoning behind this name is that Malkin and Sykora played in Magnitogorsk.
Magnitogorsk is a "steel" city or something in Russia.
Malone is from Pittsburgh.
And yeah Pittsburgh is "steeltown."
Yawn.

There are way too many issues with this nickname.
The most glaring would be Sykora played one year in Magnitogorsk.

He is from the Czech Republic.
So that means nothing.

Another reason, it is more forced than a Ben Roethlisberger pass in the playoffs.
If they all were from Pittsburgh, it would be fine.

Line nicknames are one of the best things about hockey.

A good line name can transcend time:

• "The French Connection" — Buffalo Sabres (1972-1979) — Gilbert Perreault, Rick Martin and Rene Robert; made up of three French-Canadian players

Maybe the best line name ever.

• "The Legion of Doom" — Philadelphia Flyers (1994-97) — Eric Lindros, John LeClair and Mikael Renberg

Nasty

• "The Triple Crown Line" — Los Angeles Kings (1970s-80s) — Dave Taylor, Charlie Simmer and Marcel Dionne; a reference to the Kings' logo, which features a crown; this was the first line in NHL history where each player scored 100 points or more in the same season (1980-81 NHL season).

• "The Production line" — Detroit Red Wings (1947-52) — Sid Abel, Gordie Howe, Ted Lindsay, later with Alex Delvecchio

If you played on a line called the "Production Line," you most likely were a big deal.

• "The Oreo Line,"-- Mighty Ducks-- Jesse Hall, Terry Hall, and Adam Banks. This was the line that featured Banks, who is white, playing with the Hall brothers, who are African American, on his wings
  

Only thing this proved was that Gordan Bombay was a racist.
How did that get past Walt Disney?

Other line names that never quite took off:

• "The Brothers Line" — Vancouver Canucks (2000s) — Henrik Sedin, Daniel Sedin, Anson Carter; the Sedins are the only twins picked one right after the other (Daniel went second and Henrik third in the 1999 NHL Entry Draft), and Carter is of Bajan descent and is known as "Soul Brother".

• "The 'OMG' Line" — Phoenix Coyotes — Oleg Saprykin, Mike Zigomanis, and Georges Laraque

• "The Power of the Pens" line — Pittsburgh Penguins — Mario Lemieux, Jaromir Jagr, Ron Francis

WTF?

The Penguins did have the "Century line" in the '70s.
Syl Apps Jr., Lowell MacDonald, and Jean Pronovost scored 100 goals and 200 points for 4 straight seasons



Thankfully [Wiki] has a page dedicated to this.



:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::


Chris Kelly is out indefinitely with a fractured leg. [ TSN ]
Basically, that's like the Pens losing a Max Talbot for the playoffs.


The East-leading Habs got dealt a huge blow. [ TSN ]

Stud d-man Mike Komisarek is out for three weeks with an injury shrouded in secrecy...
maybe because you can't say "balls" in a newspaper.

"Mike has a lower body injury, that's all I can tell you,
and he's going to out a minimum of three weeks," head coach Guy Carbonneau told reporters.

If the secrecy is intended to detract opposing players from going after an injury in the playoffs,
Sidney Crosby is in trouble.


8-1-1 in their last 10.
If they didn't blow those two-goal third-period leads back in February,
they'd be in the playoffs right now.

You can say something like that for every team, so that's a huge whatev.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Hart Blog

:: As [ Tom Benjamin ] found...
[ Damien Cox ] thinks Niklas Lidstrom should win the Hart Trophy.


Everyone agrees that Damien Cox should stop writing about hockey.



:: Ross McKeon over at [ Yahoo ] says give it to Jarome Iginla in Calgary.

He says Iginla is "clutch" and has grit, determination, testicles, etc.
He also tugs on your heartstrings, reminding you Iginla has twice come in second in Hart voting during his career.

Continuing our bashing of a guy who is just doing his job:


We gave your wife the Hart last night.

********************************

We know the NHL media hates Russians.
And it hurts to acknowledge it as Pens fans, but Alex Ovechkin deserves the MVP.



If the Caps don't make the playoffs, then maybe there is more of a discussion.
All Pens fans want is to see Evgeni Malkin's name up there in the running.

If Crosby had been hurt all season and the Pens remained where they are now,
it would be Malkin's all the way.

[PittHockey]

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

:: Brian Costello at [ The Hockey News ] reveals strategies he would employ if he was an NHL coach.

Patrick Roy's son is insane. [ Going Five Hole ]



Like father like son. [ Roy vs. Osgood Fight ]
Seth at [ Empty Netters ] has the story as well

[ Waiting For Stanley ] found this clip of some joke fan taunting a player in the AHL:

http://view.break.com/431795 - Watch more free videos



::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::



ATLANTIC



At this point, as we're sure all the other divisions feel, everyone is sick of each other.

The Islanders are the only team out of it.
The Flyers are hanging around the 7th-8th seed.
The Rangers, Pens, and Devils could all win the division.

Spotlight games this week:


Monday -- Pens clinch playoff spot with win

Plus, any games anyone plays is big.

NORTHEAST



Everyone talked about how solid the Atlantic division was all year,
but how sick is the Northeast.

Montreal is first in the conference.
Ottawa is middle of the pack.

Boston is clinging to the last playoff spot,
while Toronto and Buffalo are within striking distance.

Spotlight games:



A huge home-and-home series Tuesday and Thursday.
Basically by next weekend someone can start planning their summer vacation.


Ottawa has been Montreal's Achilles' Heel this season.

SOUTHEAST



Carolina looks to have the division wrapped up.
But stranger things have happened.

Tampa Basement and Atlanta are done.
The real story has to be the late-season pushes by the Capitals and Panthers.

Everyone left them for dead two weeks ago.
The Panthers do this every year, but this year, it looks legit

Spotlight games:


Saturday night.
Who wants it more?

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::



CENTRAL



Detroit clinched this division eons ago.
Chicago and Nashville are more than alive in the race for the 8th seed.
St. Louis and Columbus are done.

Spotlight game:
The Detroit Red Wings practice on Tuesday.


NORTHWEST

Vancouver and Colorado are clinging to 7 and 8 right now,
with the aforementioned Nashville and, surprisingly, Edmonton nipping at their heels.

Tonight:



PACIFIC



San Jose won like 13 straight recently, pushing them past Anaheim for the division lead.
Dallas will be getting in, too, with Phoenix and LA making out with each other.


Friday night

Have to steal this picture from the [Battle of California] because Earl Sleek is a genius.


:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

2

Do it

Mascot Gone Wild

Found this on [PenguinsThatFly] via [Going Five Hole]
Pretty funny stuff.
The Tampa Bay mascot jobs people on the beach.




Happy Easter

Demolished. PENS WIN.

[ NHL.com RECAP ]

Everyone knew this was the biggest game of the season thus far.
The only question is, did the Devils know?

At the end of one period, no one would have suspected a 7-1 runaway.

The Penguins, for the first time in a while (and maybe the season),
are atop the Atlantic Division without the Devils having that pesky "game in hand".

Things will be different on Tuesday in New Jersey.
There will be fewer fans and the Devils won't let this happen again.


-- anonbill --

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

ANTHEM


Dave in F29 -- Matt Betush

Bng66 (21697) -- Robert Regan

Captain Dummy-----Jason W

--Jimi Smail--
:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

FIRST PERIOD

Finally, after waiting all day, the puck dropped.
The Mellons made their presence known off the opening faceoff.
It was officially a playoff atmosphere.

And then it happened.
Nobody cares how it happened.

Hossa got away with a hold on the backcheck, then led a rush back up ice.
He jobs in and gets off to Dupuis, what, Ruutu, who throws into the slot.
Some turd knocks into his own net past Brodeur. 1-0.

ON FIRE

Chris Minard was the first Pens forward to throw his body around.
BGL was next. He was on a rampage in the Devils end.

-- Cory Allen --

After some jobbing, Gonchar threw the puck off the glass into the Devils zone.
Apparently, the Devils can interfere with Jordan Staal trying to wipe out the icing.
See no-call on Hossa above.

A caveat of the USS Hal Gill became apparent when John Madden was able to beat to a loose puck into the Pens zone.
After a scare, Jay Pandolfo headed to the box for trying to sink the The USS Hal Gill.

The Pens were able to set up shop and cause some headaches.
But there was a bigger headache coming.

On the PK, Madden and Gionta went nuts.
Madden got it over to Gionta, who knocked it out of mid-air and past MAF. 1-1.

What a play.

The Pens regrouped and started getting pressure.
They got rewarded when Colin White decides to rough up Talbot after the whistle.
That powerplay went to the wayside, as well.

As the first period came to a close, it was time for the Devils to get a power play.
Ruutu goes to the box for holding.
The powerplay was here and gone.

The Pens got a couple more decent shots on Brodeur before the period ended.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

[ Bob Errey Blog ] got a mention during the first.
Sounded like the boys like it.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

SECOND PERIOD

Just before the period starts, we see Dan Rooney in the press box with Big Ben.
No women were within 50 feet of that press box.

Jarkko Ruutu had taken an unsportsmanlike at the end of the first when he was trying to start some crap.
The Pens were behind the 8-ball, but they survived the PP, helped by the puck dancing on the Pens goalline.

How does that puck not go in?

After some more jobbing, Orpik lures some dude into the corner.

He eats his liver with some fava beans and a nice chianti.
[Jschiff]

Ty Conklin joined the play-by-play from the dungeon.

There are good penalties and bad penalties.
Dupuis took a bad penalty that send the Devils on their PP in a row.
But it didn't matter 'cause Zack Parise went to the box for messing with MAF.

During the ensuing 4-on-4, Jordan Staal made some kind of move that made you throw up, but he hit the pipe.

After a brief Pens PP, there was already 9:00 left in the second.
End-to-end hockey for while, but the boring Devils style kicks in.

Jordan Staal woke everyone up when he took a penalty.
Without that happening, the next goal doesn't happen.

Dupuis and Malone headed down on a relaxed shorthanded 2-on-1.
Dupuis had more patience than the Mercy Hospital.
The Devils d-man puts down his stick to block the shot rather than the pass, and Malone had an easy layup. 2-1.

--Lindsay J--

Just a huge goal.
The Pens killed off the rest of the penalty in a swell of balls as the second period ended.
The Mellon faithful start chanting Marty-Marty-Marty.

Kennedy had an unreal try with a minute left, Martin Brodeur makes a save.
And some joke in sitting in section E sits down, after realizing he doesn't have Stanley Cup rings, Vezina Trophies, etc.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

INTERMISSION HEEEEEEEEEEEEEE


Matt Betush --Jimi Smail

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

THIRD PERIOD

Early in the third, Jordan Staal continued his dominance when he ended up with an impromptu breakaway.
He gets hooked, and the puck, Brodeur, and a d-man go into the net.
People wanted a penalty shot, people wanted a goal.
No dice.
However, the pens get a powerplay.


And things have a funny way of happening.
Gonchar got the puck at the point and floated one to the net.
Malone deflects it past Brodeur, who acted like he was shot when he got nudged by Malkin.

But hold the phone.
Was Malone's stick above the crossbar?

This is a busy weekend for Jesus Christ, but he still had time to give the word from the War Room.

3-1.

Soon after, Malkin got jobbed by John Madden away from the play.
The Nation watched as Geno was slow to get up.

--Jimi Smail--

He got the wind knocked out of him.
Thank God.

And then right after that, the Rascal was allowed to stand on the Devils goal line for a hour and just fired one at Brodeur.
It deflects in. 4-1.

--Hutch--

Devils Fans= Stunned

Erica--703

--Jason W--

Chants of M-A-R-R-R-R-R-TY......M-A-R-R-R-R-R-R-TY rained down onto the Mellon Ice.
The same joke in section E stands up after realizing he didn't cheat on his wife with her sister.

In a weird move, the Devils swap goalies after the next whistle.

Brodeur = Stunned.

-- Jason Murray --

The Pens were given another power play, and you could see Father Time putting his jacket on.

Father Time ended up just texting the Devils instead of showing up, when he saw that Malkin put one through the wickets to get his 100th point of the season. 5-1.

After some more crap, Malkin scored again, which was pretty much one nail too many into the Devils coffin, conveyed with a photoshop by a man named --Hoffin.--

He stole the puck from a Devil and just came out in front and buried it. 6-1.

He knows it.

It was gonna get ugly.
And it happened what Pat Zajak tells Gonchar to buy a vowel when he boards him.
The Pens come to the rescue.

A five-minute power play resulted.
Malkin might as well have carried a tee around, since everyone was setting him up for his hat trick, but it never came.

The 5-minute major was gone.

And that was it. The Devils had been crushed.

Oh, wait. Malkin to Sykora. 7-1.

And then it was over.

--Rachele--


Game.

STATS

• Malkin: 2G, 1A
• Hossa: 3A
• Malone: 2G
• Sykora: 1G, 2A
• Dupuis: 1G, 1A
• MAF: 24 Saves
  

MISCELLANEOUS

• That's 25 goals in the last four home games.
• Sidney Crosby did not play in any of those.
• It would lose its novelty, but talking to Conks in the dungeon is pretty solid.
• You can see why the Devils are beasts. They bank on Marty and wait for their chances.
• Pens held the Devils to five shots in the third period.
• Hossa is sick.
• Dupuis has played ten games as a Penguin. He has scored in seven of them.
• Did Devils coach Brett Sutter throw up on the bench?
• Duggan 4-0. Might be his last appearance of the regular season.
  

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::


2

GameDay (75) -- Devils @ Penguins

7:30



This is the biggest game of the season to date.
That will change in a couple days when the Pens and Devils play again.

Tonight is huge.
Everyone knows it.
Can you remember the last time a regular-season game was this huge?




If you needed to be told that, you shouldn't even be here.

Lord Therrien puts out a call to arms. [PG]

"We're going to need our fans to be really loud," he said. "I know my players. They feed off the fans. ... It's not a coincidence the last month and a half we've been successful [at home] -- our fans are really loud."


After this game, both the Devils and Pens have seven games left.

Pens --- Devils









If you didn't hate all the other teams in the division now, buckle up.
We'll be rooting for one team one night, then wanting them to jump off a cliff 24 hours later.

And the worst thing about it is, what looked like a two-team race,
may now be a three-team battle, because the Rangers are out of their minds.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

The day they brought old St. Francis hospital down





***Update****

Found this on LGP:




::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::


So many huge games today/tonight in the East



Original sixblog game.
Bruins need a win. So do the Habs



Old-fashion hate in this one.
If Toronto wins, they are still breathing in the playoff race.
If they lose, it's bad for them.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

You know what time it is now.


HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Behind The Numbers

:: St. Francis Hospital = 11th Hour [ PG ]
To be demolished Saturday afternoon.

:: Scuderi's pending return has heads spinning. [ PG ]

NHL.com has been all business when it comes to the Pens.

:: Does the Penguins' youth lessen their chalice chances? [ NHL.com ]

:: What did the Pens learn from last year's tournament? [ NHL.com Video ]

This sentence is here just so we can have a cool pyramid effect for this section. Boobs.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::


Ovechkin gets his 60th. [ TSN ]
Hate him or really hate him, it's a good thing to see.


That Okposo mudder scored the game-winner with less than 3:00 left.
It sets up an unreal game tonight.


Zednik skated. Nice. [ TSN ]

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

PETR SYKORA


Where does Petr Sykora stand among other 2007 offseason acquisitions?



JASON BLAKE -- $4.000 million
74 GP -- 13G -- 32A -- 45P


DUSTIN PENNER -- $4.250 million
75 GP -- 20G -- 22A -- 44P


SCOTT GOMEZ -- $7.357 million
74 GP -- 16G -- 51A -- 67P

CHRIS DRURY -- $7.050 million
74 GP -- 23G -- 28A -- 51P


RYAN SMYTH -- $6.250 million
82 Games -- Adjusted
24 G -- 34A -- 58P


PAUL KARIYA -- $6.000 million
74 GP -- 15G -- 42A -- 57P


DANIEL BRIERE -- $6.500 million
73 GP -- 26G -- 37A -- 63P (Plus/Minus: -24)


TODD BERTUZZI -- $4.00 million
61 GP -- 14 G -- 22A -- 36P


ROBERT LANG -- $4.000 million
70 GP -- 20G -- 32A -- 52P


MIKE COMRIE -- $3.375 million
74 GP -- 21G -- 28A -- 49P (Plus/Minus: -22)


PETR SYKORA -- $2.625 million
73 GP -- 26G -- 33A -- 59P (Plus/Minus: +2)

We'd call Ray Shero and tell him he's a beast,
but he's too busy signing a solid babysitter to a two-year deal under market value.

Salary Cap Crap -- [ NHLNumbers.com ]

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

DEFENSEMEN PENALTY MINUTE AVERAGES

We wanted to find out which Pens d-men take the most penalties
in direct correlation with their ice time.

We totaled the number of minutes played and divided it by half of their penalty-minute total.

So if Charlie played 60 minutes in a season and had 6 penalty minutes,
he would average one penalty every 20 minutes of ice time.

**Just take it at face value.

****************************************

Gonchar -- 26:00 per game.
One penalty every 62 minutes of ice time.
One penalty every 7.25 periods. (2.41 games)

Gill -- 20:00 per game.
One penalty every 49 minutes of ice time.
One penalty every 7.30 periods. (2.44 games)


Orpik -- 17:00 per game.
One penalty every 51.75 minutes of ice time.
One penalty every 9.13 periods. (3.04 games)

Whitney -- 23:00 per game.
One penalty every 73 minutes of ice time.
One penalty every 9.61 periods. (3.20 games)


Scuderi -- 19:00 per game.
One penalty every 93.5 minutes of ice time.
One penalty every 14.8 periods. (4.93 games)

Sydor -- 17:45 per game.
One penalty every 115 minutes of ice time.
One penalty every 19.43 periods. (6.47 games)

Letang -- 18:30 per game.
One penalty every 129.5 minutes of ice time.
One penalty every 21 periods. (7 games)

Eaton -- 19:40 per game.
One penalty every 353.88 minutes of ice time.
One penalty every 54.44 periods. (18.13 games)

Conclusion:

At face value, Kris Letang's stock just went up.
Eaton, wow.

But there's way too many variables:
Dudes are killing penalties when taking a penalty is less likely.
Gonchar is up against top units every night.
ETC.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

PLUS/MINUS

As of Saturday 2:00 A.M., there were only two teams in the NHL
that didn't have a top-6 defenseman in the minus column.



Gonchar +10
Whitney 0
Gill +3
Letang +1
Sydor +2
Orpik +5
Scuderi +2
Eaton +6

The only blemish on the Pens stat sheet is Alain Nasreddine,
who sported a -4 in 6 games this season.


Dallas was close.
Some jobber, Trevor Daley, is -2.


The mighty Sens were close, too.
Luke Richardson is -1.

The Capitals being the only other team throws you a curveball.

But seeing that two other NHL powerhouses are close to having no d-men in the minus,
it must mean something, or maybe not. Whatev.

..................................................................................................

The Pens have 10 regulation losses at home this year...
lowest in the Eastern Conference.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

4

Bend It Like Ruutu. PENS WIN.

[ NHL.com RECAP ]

If someone asked you to sum up Jarkko Ruutu's career as a Penguin,
this would be a game you would reference.

Ruutu was out of his mind and gave the Pens a huge spark.

Saturday night.
Devils vs. Pens

Doesn't get much bigger.


.................................................

Anthem

[Joey L]------------------------------------[Demondg1]


[Captain dummy]----------------------------[noname]

[Sara L]


::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

FIRST PERIOD

Early on, the Ryan Whitney HateWagon would have filled to capacity if the refs had caught his high stick on Tampa Bay's Philip Kuba.

The USS Hal Gill punishes Marty St. Louis coming down the right-wing boards.
What a beast.
That kind of play will change games in three weeks.

A stretch of the first period consisted of Steiggy saying a Pen "was tripped up but no penalty called" when a Lightning player had simply knocked them off the puck.

Really good action to open up the game as we get 10 minutes of break free hockey.

Therrien's troops almost got a PP when the Lightning had about 11 people on the ice, but a mouthful of his own feces left Paul Devorski unable to blow the whistle.

That Ryan Whitney HateTrain eventually started taking boarding passes when he went to the box.
Trying to show the ref he was innocent almost cost the Pens a goal, as your friendly neighborhood garbage man almost put one past MAF.

The Pens killed that off, helped by a nice glover by MAF.

It took the Pens another minute or so to continue their cycling ways.
Eventually, Orpik was able to blast one from the point.
Ruutu put in the juicy rebound.

1-0.

As he was scoring, Rutuu took a stick to the face.
It is the equivalent tof you doing something really good a work, and just as you're about to celebrate, the old-as-balls secretary comes out of nowhere and kicks you in the mouth.

The jobbing doesn't go by the wayside though.
Blood was drawn, but because the Pens had scored, they were only given a 2-minute PP.
Tampa killed it.
And that was it for the first.

.....................................

Complaintblog

For some reason, FSN misses a face-off on the powerplay.

This happened throughout the game, in many different situations.

This cannot happen.
You have to show face-offs.

No one gives a shit about stupid graphics.
No one cares about replays if we are going to miss the game happening.

This ain't WTAE.

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

SECOND PERIOD

We get reminded that Tampa Bay is unreal in the second period.
And they came out and backed that stat up.

Tampa got an early power play in the second.
They didn't score on it, but it didn't matter.

Not long after that penalty was killed, Ruutu jobs someone from behind.
Your cousin Vinny puts one top shelf, after MAF's brain explodes.

1-1.

After some nothingness, the Pens went nuts in the Lightning zone, forcing them to clutch and grab.
Unfortunately, whistles were up butts.

The Pens played a pretty tight defense game.
Orpik has completely turned his season around.
He was scary tonight.

FINALLY, after controlling the Lightning zone all game, hard work pays off.
Whitney makes his second solid keep-in-the-zone play of the shift.
This time, he got it over to Malkin.

After Malkin got a handle on it, he roofed it backhand.

[Kevin E]

2-1.

The second frame start nearing an end, and it was whatev.

Hossa started going nuts.
It is hard to explain his skating style when he has the puck.
What a player.

The Pens can't get anything home.

COTTON CANDY HEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

[Cindy H]

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

THIRD PERIOD

If there was ever a time for a picture-in-picture, it was during that intermission.
Belmont had Duke on the ropes in the NCAA tournament.

Meanwhile, the stat for the third period was that the Lightning are the worst third-period team in hockey.
So you knew a potential meltdown loomed.

Belmont up one.
Staal scores.
3-1

Before you could switch back to watch, the refs try to fix it for Duke.

Sykora and Malkin go to Chemistry class.

4-1

Belmont ws still stunning the world.
Pens take a penalty. Dukes takes the lead.

Belmont throws a hail mary up.
Some joke scores for Tampa Basement 3-2.

Belmont stunned.

Things got dicey for a few minutes after that.
Ruutu went to the box for something stupid.

Hossa and Talbot almost teamed up for a goal on the PK.
Hossa's saucer passes are sick.

The game had the potential to become boring after that, but thankfully, Tampa isn't fighting for a playoff spot.
Great hockey followed for a few solid minutes.

After the Pens dominated the Lightning zone again, Ruutu got his stick slashed out of his hands, but still led a 2-on-1 down the ice using his skates to kick it along.
The pass with his skate gets through, and the Pens nearly score.

If the Pens connect there, good God.

The Pens did get a PP though.
But no dice.

And then Father Time came to the Mellon.
It was do-or-die time for Tampa Basement, but they couldn't get it out of their own zone.

Before you knew it, there was a minute left in the game.
Tampa eventually pulled Smith and called a timeout.
What are they doing. Just pack it up.

Malkin almost gets his 100th point on the season with an empty-net assist, but Marian Hossa thought he was in the central time zone.

Game.

STATS

• Malkin: 1G ,1A
• Sykora: 1G
• MAF: 19 Saves
  

MISCELLANEOUS

• Kris Letang is the smoothest defenseman for the Penguins. This had to be said.
• Every game Hossa playes, he looks better. He may score a goal someday.
  
• JFK=solid
• Mike Smith is a solid goalie. He kept the Lightning in it, despite the 16-second goal thing.
• Seemed like a nice crowd on hand.
• Bob Errey hit Therrien with the microphone while attempting to interview him.
• Staal is starting to find the net.
• Roberts 3:16.
• At least the Penguins beat Lightning bolts, as opposed to women

6

GameDay (74) -- Lightning @ Pens

7:30

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

We all know what happened last time the Lightning visited Mellon Arena.

The last time these two teams played, it was the return of Sidney Crosby, too.
It was scoreless for about 57 minutes until Max Talbot put in the game-winner.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Pitt was able to beat Gary Roberts in the NCAA Tourney today.

It could be moot, because some people may be wiping their butt with their bracket sheet.

Our impromptu Yahoo tournament ended up getting upwards of 120 participants.
That's unrealistically solid given the 8-hour notice we gave everyone.

A WWGRD wristband is on the line.
Don't ask how we scrounged up a couple, 'cause we don't even know.



Unfortunately, we weren't able to gather the funds necessary
to do a second round of WWGRD wristbands this year.

There will be a campaign for Roberts to come back for one more season,
so we'll see where that takes us.

In a perfect world, CafePress would offer to sell wristbands, but no dice.

hossa

A March To Madness

Yeah, the NCAA tournament starts.
Solid sports day.
But come 7:38pm, who cares.

We know it's late.
But for those interested...

We created a bracket at [Yahoo]

Name: 172786
Password: mario


Winner gets their choice:
One of our 4 remaining WWGRD wristbands or like 20 bucks.


::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Aftermath

Ryan Whitney handing out turnovers.
[Josh B]

:: Lord Therrien is like whatev. Maybe the Rangers game was OK. [Trib]



The Rangers are now officially on fire.
They picked up two huge points after beating the Devils for the sixth time of the season last night.
[Interchangeable Parts]

Chris Drury got a big contract and has been a little above mud this season.

But when you win big faceoffs, and score game-tying goals late in March,
you're worth every penny.

( also see: the exact opposite of Dan Briere )


That picture is what it's about.

What an atmosphere at this game.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::




:: Crosby is still out until at least next week. [PG]

:Mr. Kennnnedy [Trib]

[Tanner]

:: Soild article about the Penguins Dads. [NHL.com]




:: [PSAMP] has a good piece about Gary Roberts.

[Hutch]

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Mario had aftershave?

[Thanks to J.S for the tip]

We did some some brief research and can't seem to find out any more details.
Anyone know?

::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::






From two nights ago...
Vesa Toskala with the biggest mistake of his life:



Brutal. Leafs won, though.



Speaking of Brutal.
The Lightning let Buffalo score six third-period goals.
[DieByTheBlade]






Commit to the joke.
Captials get steamrolled by the Blackhawks.
[Japers Rink]


Picture: A retired Jason Voorhees acknowledges the crowd before the game.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

:: The Eastern Conference Playoff celebrity rankings. [Barry Melrose Rocks]


If you can compare the Toronto Maple Leafs to Screech, you did something.
The picture is in the top-ten Internet pictures right now.


:: [Mirtle M.D.] takes a look back in the time machine to the pre-season predictions.

:: ECHL. Stunned. [AOL Fanhouse]





::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

We got this picture from an anonymous source a few days ago.



The question is, how do we get a spirit award?

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

8

Beast Of Burden. PENS LOSE.

[ NHL.com RECAP ]


This is the time of year.
The sun is still shining during the opening faceoff.
These aren't the kind of games you're going to sleep through.

You see stuff like this driving home from work:


It can't be ignored that the Pens haven't played their best hockey in MSG this season.

What also can't be ignored is that David Copperfield says the Pens still haven't clinched a playoff spot.

After Tampa Basement on Thursday, we play each divisional foe twice to end the season.
We have two games against the Devils within the next 7 days.

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ANTHEM

[Ian]


[Nick, James, Thom, & Shelly]

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FIRST PERIOD

This time of year, the phrase "Weather the Storm" becomes your best friend.
Tonight was the perfect example.

Rangers coming off two losses, needing a win.
They are gonna come out harder than some old guy on Viagra.

Whistles were hard to come by in the early going.
Both Conks and King Henrik were making solid saves.
Great hockey.

Conkblock even spiced things up by misplaying the puck behind his net, but he gets the lumber down and stops an easy goal.
Sean Avery would have scored, but he tans too much.

Finally, a whistle came when Hossa and Dupuis started changing the world.
Pedro Gomez jobs one of them, and the Pens get the first PP of the game.

[Pat J.]

You would've been wise during those next two minutes to take a crap in your neighbor's mailbox.
What turned out to be the Pens' only PP of the night was fruitless.

Sometime in the next few minutes, your ears gets blasted when the microphones in the boards pick up a slapshot.

And Double J takes over.

You can say whatever the hell you want.
When Jaromir Jagr turns it on, no one has a chance.

He glides down the right wing.
Drops it to Mr. Tan. Sean Avery gets the puck near the high slot.
What a shot. 1-0.

Nice celebration, homo.

Then the wheels start falling off.
40 seconds later, Conkblock gives up the biggest rebound of his career possibly, and Tommy Callahan continues his presence in Penguin games.
2-0.

"Shut up, Richard"

The rest of the first was a waiting game; waiting for the Pens to get called for a penalty.
But it didn't happen.

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SECOND PERIOD

Being behind in games hasn't been a problem for the Pens these last couple years.
The next goal of this game was gonna tell everyone where it was headed.

Luckily, the Rangers make a horrible line change, sparking Ruutu on a lazy breakaway.

You could actually see fumes of charisma streaking behind him as he does the Ruutu Move™ 2-1.

On the Pens next shift, they strike again.
Dupuis takes advantage of a Ranger mishap and gets it to the net.
Staal gets two whacks at it, and it was tied that fast. 2-2.

The two quick strikes by the Pens hit the Rangers harder than James Hariston hits his...

Everything was going fine.
Then it happened...

The Pens were in their own zone. Sydor to Whitney.
Whitney makes by far the most egregious mistake of the season.

He blindly throws the puck into his own slot.
That sentence is great.

Irwin R. Schyster of the Rangers gets an abbreviated breakaway all alone.
Conk is stunned.

3-2

vomit

What a mistake.

After you pick your balls/ovaries off the floor,
Sean Avery and Ryan Malone start jobbing.

Both gets penalties. Malone goes to the box, Avery goes to a tanning booth.
Just as those penalties were expiring, Dupuis went to the box for dominating.

The Pens survive a scare early on that PP, when a puck flirted with going in, but the Pens kept it out.
Kerry Fraser texts the War Room, and it is settled rather easily.

A big kill for the Pens.

The second period was hitting the homestretch, the Pens stole the puck from Avery, and they were off to the races.
Somehow, Malkin was onside, but Malone was stopped by Henrik.

Jordan Staal got called for some weak-ass penalty, but the Rangers couldn't do anything with it.
The Pens ended up getting the best chance during those two minutes, but Malkin's shot was blocked.

Sadly, this was still when the Pens had a chance.

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THIRD PERIOD


Dicks

All you need to know:


Game.

Games like this force us to call upon the services of an old friend.

STATS

• Your mom

MISCELLANEOUS

• Staal loves MSG.
• Your girlfriend loves Staal.
• Marty Straka. Still a big deal after all these years.
• You should never hit a woman.
  
• Hossa is still sick.
  
• Scoods?
• USS Hall Gill's dive for a loose puck was money in the bank.
  

8

GameDay (73) -- Pens @ Rangers

7:00



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The last time the Pens were in MSG,
Chicken Little was telling Marty the sky was falling on the Pens season.

It was one of only two times this season the Pens have been shutout.

"Season is over. Pack it up."


Shut up, dick.

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Conks is getting the start tonight.

And in a weird twist of irony, we'll be on Hal Gill's side tonight when he tangles with Double J.

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Let's hope Pittsburgh sports continues its recent dominance of Madison Square Garden

The Post's the Thing Wherein We'll Catch the Conscience of Bing

First things first.

Pitt had a nice run.
But the Panthers unfortunately drew an unbeatable foe in the first round.



[ PittBlather ] is the place to be for your Pitt needs.

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If it wasn't for [ NHL Tournament of Logos ],
someone would have killed themselves over this past summer.

The guy over there held a tournament among logos (which Montreal won), and he was the one-stop shop for all the news regarding the new Reebok uniforms going into this season.

He's at it again, getting primed for a goalie-mask tournament.

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:: Gonch says shut up about the "Malkin not playing hard when Bing plays" thing. [ Trib ]

We couldn't agree more.
If you sit around worrying about this all day, it might be time to move on.
Debates like this only exist so people like Eddie Pelican and Guy Joke can have jobs.

With that said...

Vintage Smizik:
[ Trade Crosby. JK, LOL ]


:: Mike Brophy from [ The Hockey News ] says he's narrowed his Hart Trophy candidates
to four people: Luongo, Brodeur, Ovechkin, Iginla.

You always hear fans griping that one of their players should get recognition.
But it's truly a shame that Malkin is not even mentioned in most Hart talk.

:: Dave Molinari breaks down all potential first-round playoff opponents. [ PG ]

:: Conkblock tonight. [ Trib ]

:: [ The View From F ]
:: [ BGL Songs ]

...............................................................................


[Glenn]
Maybe one of the strangest Photoshops all year.
Unreal though.

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AFTERMATH


:: Malkin shrugs off the Richards-skate thing. [ PG ]



"It was so fast. I didn't really have a chance to think about it.
It's a good thing it wasn't something serious, but it's not a big deal for me."

The look on his face after it happened says differently. He wanted to kill him.

:: The Flyers/Crosby rivalry. Nice read. [ Flyers.com ]
-Thanks to everyone who sent this along.

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StompGate

You knew it was coming. [ TSN ]



"I think it's definitely not fair. My opinion is there's obviously two sets of rules."
-- Chris Simon

"Simon's skate drop on the Pittsburgh player was in a totally different context
than Chris Pronger's," Campbell told the Pioneer-Press in an email.

Colin Campbell is just praying that Chris Pronger doesn't do something stupid in the playoffs.

:: Burnside dominates something about suspensions. [ ESPN ]



:: Repeating as Cup champs is a bitch. [ NHL.com ]

:: [ Mirtle the Maniac ] figures out goals-for and goals-against by period for all 30 teams.

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Hatcher's done for the year.
Umberger's out a couple weeks. [ TSN ]


Apparently, they're underrated. [ Star-Ledger ]


The Islanders are done.
So they are bringing up prized prospect Kyle Okposo. [ Fanhouse ]


The Panthers are out of their minds.
They're suddenly only 2 points out of 8th in the east.
We even found a Panthers blog. [ Daily Puck ]


Kovy = Beast

Seth over at [ Empty Netters ] found this:



When you workout with sunglasses on, you're a big deal.

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We're in the Eastern Conference.
The Western Conference matters for empty season and playoffs previews.

But there's some interesting developments in their playoff race.


Edmonton and Phoenix have been the butt of many of our ignorant jokes.

They're both 5 points out of a playoff spot.
Too bad Phoenix lost to Vancouver last night.


The Blue Jackets and Blackhawks are still in the hunt, 7 points out.

[ NHL STANDINGS ]

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[ 5,000 Mario Lemieux Pics ]
Some are never-before-seen. Unreal.

.......................................

Hall of Fame pictures:





How sick is the Conn Smythe trophy?

Thanks to Don for sending these in.

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8

It Ain't Worth Winning If You Don't Win Big. PENS WIN.

[ NHL.com RECAP ]


There is a lot you can say about this game.
But words don't do it justice.

How bad was it?
An actual post on some Flyers message board:

[ Something is Inherently Wrong With This Organization ]

That narrowly beats out this post as post of the day:
[ **** You Stevens ]

It's bittersweet because there's no use rubbing it in.
Fittingly, after the game, NBC switched to golf.

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Anthem

[Kris R]


[Dustin]------------------------------------[Tristan]


[Captain Dummy]--------------------------------[Andrew M]


[Allison N]


[James S]


[Eli N]
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FIRST PERIOD

Early on, the pending Hossa honeymoon was gonna have to wait a while 'cause the Pens get caught with too many men on the ice.

That penalty seemed like it was only a minute long, probably because Evgeni Malkin was on the ice.

MalkinTime wasn't over though, because he comes from behind the net and scores some sort of crazy no-look backhand goal. Then he gives Martin Biron the Razor's Edge to cap it off.

1-0.

We have no NHL goaltending experience of which to speak.
But what a weak goal to give up.

After the Pens killed off a Ryan Whitney roughing penalty, it was time again for another goal.
Dupuis and Sykora team up.

It was 2-0 that fast.
What a pass by Dupuis.

The Flyers' Riley Cote unleashes a solid hit on Sykora, and Ryan Malone didn't like it.
Malone goes into a gunfight with Riley Cote, but Malone only brought a fly swatter.

It had to be done, though.
If Cote was even somewhat aware his team is in the midst of a playoff race, he lets Malone go to the box.

Somehow, late in the first, the speed of the game jumped up a notch.

What happened next may have led to Mike Richards' death.
He gets faked out by Malkin behind the Pens net.

He actually lifts his skate up in the air on purpose as a last-ditch effort to thwart Malkin.
He wasn't trying to cut his face, but he was throwing his leg back in order to impede him.
The downside is that there's a sharp blade at the end of his leg.

While everyone waited to see what was going to happen, Sykora got a high-sticking penalty.

The Pens killed off the first part of that penalty in the first period.
Remember, Pascal Dupuis is everywhere you want him to be.

And the Pens headed to the locker room, anxious to hear and/or see what Mike Richards did to Malkin.

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NBC's Mike Milbury comes out swinging during the intermission, jobbing Colin Campbell's handling of the Chris Pronger situation.

It felt like that whole even-Steven segment with Pierre Maguire was scripted anyway.

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SECOND PERIOD

The Pens survived a scare early in the second when the Flyers were buzzing, but Mike Knuble knocked the net off.
The penalty was killed, and it was just a waiting game until the Flyers started parading to the penalty box.

Not like the Pens needed power plays.
Ruutu-Talbot-Kennedy refused to be denied in the Flyers zone.

The play no one will think twice about was Talbot knocking the puck maybe 8 inches over to Kennedy while sprawled out on the ice.
Kennedy was able to backhand it top-shelf for a 3-0 lead.

What the hell was Martin Biron doing?
John Stevens sends him to the showers.

[Jschiff]

Later on, Hossa made pretty much his first appearance of the game, centering an odd-man rush.
Dupuis gets a solid shot off, but the Flyers finally had a goalie.

Some plugger no one's even heard of puts a late hit on Kris Letang on an icing call, well after the whistle, and the Flyers go to the box.
We reiterate -- the Flyers are fighting for a playoff spot.

The Flyers were able to neutralize the Pens PP.
And a couple minutes later, they were able to get one past MAF. 3-1.
What would a Pens/Flyers game be without a Mike Knuble goal?

Maybe the Flyers do care.

Well, maybe not.

Malkin drove to the net later, and Braydon Cobourn was overmatched and was eventually turned around and jobbed his goalie.

Malone tries to drag it around some joke.
It falls off his stick, but Sykora is there to push it to the net.

Malkin with the lay-up.

4-1.

And then it happened...

Before you could finish thinking about that goal, Gonchar finds Hossa, and Hossa just buries it, and serves the Flyers some fresh hot poop. 5-1.

People wait for moments like that all their lives.
Flyers coach John Stevens calls a timeout after the goal so they can all make out.

The only downside with a blowout-in-progress is that it was against the Flyers, so it was gonna start getting chippy eventually.

It took the Pens having a 5-1 lead for obstruction and holding to start being called.
The Pens jump on a power play to close out the second.

The Pens had something going for the first half of it, but then it was mud.

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Cotton candy heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

R. J Jokeburger, who got hurt earlier in the period, gets his injury report:

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THIRD PERIOD

The third period had the potential to be...

1) Flyers delivering cheap shots.
2) Malkin chasing Ovechkin.

He got his fourth point of the night when he sets up Sykora in the slot. 6-1.

[Andrew M]

Father Time had already come and gone by the time Mike Richards freight-trains Connor James.
Chris Minard jumps on him and gets the job done.
Richards is a coward.

The interesting part of that was Mike Richards getting a game misconduct, along with Minard.
The refs were stopping anything before it began.

The Pens came out of that mess with a power play, but no dice.

And then it happened.
Ray Shero issued a strike against Philadelphia.
The USS Hal Gill moved into position.

7-1.

After that, you could sit back and enjoy it.
The Pens get a power play late when the refs make it known that the Flyers weren't gonna make this game a joke.

Remember when John Stevens kept putting out his top PP in that 8-2 loss back in December??

Therrien has a smirk on his face as he puts Talbot-Ruutu-Kennedy on the PP.

Malkin and Company jump onto the ice for the second half, to a boisterous cheer from the Mellonites.
The Pens were trying to get Petr Sykora his third goal of the game, because he has never registered a hat trick.
Stunning, but true.
But no dice.

The Flyers bus was already warmed up.

[Jschiff]

GAME.

[Ryan M]

STATS

• Malkin: 2G, 2A
• Sykora: 2G, 2A
• Hossa: 1G, 1A
• Gill: 1G, 1 A
• Dupuis: 3A
• Malone: 2A
• MAF: 24 saves.
  

MISCELLANEOUS

• Another convincing win without Sidney Crosby.
• The Flyers are in big touble.
• Hacksaw 3-0
• USS Hal Gill. Big-time player right now.
• Letang looks like he has played in the NHL for 15 years. Insane.
• Good times.

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For those of you who missed the "History of the Penguins" thing from FSN...

You can download it [Here]
Thanks to poster Hyzdufan on [LGP] for the link.

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8

GameDay (72) -- Flyers @ Penguins

12:00pm



If someone has to tell you how huge this game is...
You don't deserve genitalia.

We hope everyone is ready for these next ten games.
Because it is all business from here on out.


Philly gets a point in a 3-2 overtime loss to Boston yesterday.

Basically they are playing for their playoff lives.
Everyone is playing for their playoff lives.


:: Hossa, Talbot return. [PG]

[Kevin D]


:: MAF in net. [Trib]


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Chris Pronger = 8-game suspension for stomp.
Ducks = 9 regular-season games remaining.
[ TSN ]
[ Hockey.com ]

“In attempting to free himself, Pronger carelessly and recklessly brought his foot down,”
Colin Campbell said in a statement.


A Buffalo mime reacts to the odor of bullcrap coming from Colin Campbell in Toronto.

Is he serious?
That is how a jobber uses the English language to skirt a major issue.



Rewind to Chris Simon's suspension:

“While it was fortunate there was no serious injury to Mr. Ruutu as a result of Simon’s action, the deliberate act of kicking an opponent with an exposed skate blade, especially where the opponent is in a vulnerable position, is and always has been a repugnant and totally unacceptable act in the game of hockey. "

“In addition, while the act itself was extremely dangerous, the fact that this is the eighth incident requiring the imposition of supplementary discipline on Simon compelled me to impose a very severe penalty in this case.”

Wow.
By the way, this was Pronger's 8th suspension of his career, too.

Giving him 9 games would've made it a little too obvious
that the NHL wants the Ducks together in time for the playoffs.

Both people stomped on another player with their skate.
This is like the prosecution entering a temporary-insanity plea for the defendant.

We're not saying we're on Chris Simon's side.
He should have been kicked out of the NHL for the baseball swing at Ryan Hollweg's face last season.

Sadly, this will be the last anyone's gonna hear of this suspension...
until Pronger gets suspended for the ninth time when he does something stupid in this year's playoffs.



During the Canadiens' recent West-Coast swing, a couple of the teams requested the Habs bring their red jerseys along, since they're just awesome.

We've missed seeing the red Canadiens jersey at Mellon Arena.
Terry Frei wants the home team to wear the whites. [ ESPN ]




A cleanly-shaved young Gary Roberts.


Is that a young Gary Roberts?

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Mad Dash To The Finish [ Yahoo ]
Ross McKeon predicts the Pens will finish second in the Atlantic to New Jersey.


His mom predicted he would be picked last in middle-school dodgeball.


In a battle of two teams fighting for their right to live,
Buffalo goes into Toronto and shocks them 6-2.


Lose to Montreal.
Presumed dead.


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[Storeblog]

Now Available in the Miscellaneous section:


Commit To The Stoosh

[Special thanks to Boo for the artwork, and Stoosh for letting us use his likeness]
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10

Those pesky Sabres

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Have to bring him out:


HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

IceBurgh Was A Terrorist

We don't have any particular college rooting interest.
But we wanted to wish the gang over at [PittBlather] good blogging tonight.

Pitt plays Georgetown in the Big East Tournament final.

.......................................
Now the reason for the post:

Sudden Death is easily top 10 movies of all time.
Mostly because of this fight sequence.



.................................

Go Pens

Beast

From [LGP]

Gatorade Does Not Cure High Ankle Sprains... Scientist Stunned

Like we've said...
Coming here for breaking news will be the biggest mistake of your life.

Crosby is out another week or whatev. [PG]

"If it was the playoffs, yeah, for sure [I would play]," he said

That's all you need to know.

In other Crosby news, a new Gatorade commercial has been spreading over the Internet.



Solid.

..........................................................
............................................................

It doesn't seem to be on YouTube yet,
but FSN's "History of the Penguins" was good times.
Tons of great interviews.

The last interview: Gary Roberts.

In an era where sportscasters think they are a big deal, FSN's Rob King is a breath of fresh air.

His narration of "History of the Penguins" in summary:

Emmy.

....................................................
....................................................



::BGL isn't happy about his suspension. [PG]

"I barely touched him. He's 5-[feet]-10, I'm 6-3. I looked at the play a million times. I didn't raise my elbow. I was surprised he got hurt.

The most important thing is that this leaves the Pens without an enforcer for the Flyers game.
Someone on [LGP] said bring up career joke Dennis Bonvie.

Although that will never happen and is a stupid idea,
maybe Bonvie could take a lifetime suspension and slash the Flyers Head Coach John Stevens after the national anthem.

It could happen.


:: The Pens had their annual Skates and Plates for the Cystic Fibrosis Foundation.[PittsburghPenguins.com]




Could you imagine telling Gary Roberts your plate was cold?



There are more pictures [here]


Hossa's first action as a Penguin in two weeks.
What is that dude on the left about?

....................................................
....................................................

Gdub at [Deadspin] found this:



Wow.
............................................
...........................................

NHL



All three won last night.

Buffalo is back within two points of the Flyers with a 7-1 win over the Canes. [Die By The Blade]
Washington is hanging around. [Japers' Rink]

Florida always does this.
[ Are there any Florida Panther blogs out there?]



The Chris Pronger stomping issue keeps getting stranger. [TSN]
Now the NHL wants to take another look at it, because a better video is now available.




Earl Sleek from the [Battle of California] drives the point home better than we could have:

"Journalists, message-boarders, bloggers, and commenters all chimed in very strongly with a loud cry for justice, and wow it seems to be getting results. The league seems to be listening. Even if tonight’s decision goes against everything I’ve personally been preaching, I don’t know if I’ve ever been as proud of the hockey internet as I am tonight. It’s just fascinating to see a cumulative voice of the fan make change in an often-stubborn league."


Bottom line, the NHL should looked into this a little more before saying Pronger wasn't going to be suspended. But whatever it's the Western Conference, it doesn't affect us right now.

If that was someone from the Senators, we would have called the police.

....................................................

Go Pens

Dial H For Hossa

Not much going on in Penguin land.
It's on days like these that you wish the Eliminator from American Gladiators was in your basement.


( We're switching all the logos to this circular design.
This is the kind of stuff we get excited about. )

:: Solid article by Mike Prisuta about the Pens locker room. [Trib]

Still no update on Hossa. But we're saying he's playing.
We also said your girlfriend wasn't cheating on you, and we were wrong about that, so whatev.

:: The Pens will be playing an exhibition game next season in Finland. [ PG ]
The best part about it is that they'll be playing in a town (or team) called Jokerit.


Solid logo.

And we found this Jokerit video on YouTube.
Look at the comment section with all the Finnish jobbing going on.



WTF
Who sings that song?


:: Hooks Orpik over at [ The Sweater Ted ]
examines the personal milestones some Pens are approaching.

:: [ James Mirtle M.D. ] estimates the Pens have lost 155 man-games this season.
Join us as we say, is that all????


The Bill Masterton Trophy.
Named after a player who died from injuries sustained in an NHL game back in 1968.

"It is awarded to the NHL player who best exemplifies qualities of perseverance, sportsmanship and dedication to hockey."

Each team gets a person nominated.
Local hockey writers take part in the process.

Your 2007-08 Penguins nominee: Ty Conklin.
[ Trib ]

Your 1995-96 Winner:


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Have you honestly watched a Pens game since February 26th
and thought, "Man, where's Christensen and Army?"

You simply just don't have the energy to think about it during a playoff run.

Army: 7 Games
2 Goals, 3 Assists, -1

Crusher: 7 Games
2 Goals, 1 Assist, -3

Esposito: Touching himself

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AFTERMATH



Buffalo's Nathan Paetsch may be done for the year
after getting a concussion from the Laraque elbow. [ Yahoo ]

:: BGL gets suspended 3 games for the People's Elbow. [ Sportsnet.ca ]

That will make him available for the Tampa Bay game next Thursday,
which is actually the only remaining non-Atlantic game on the Pens schedule.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::


Speaking of suspensions, Chris Pronger is getting NOTHING for his stomp. [ TSN ]


Thanks to Canaan for this better vid.


Flyers stunned that the Leafs swept the home-and-home. [ Toronto Sun ]


Surprise. Havlat gets season-ending surgery. [ Chicago Tribune ]


Kris Draper tore his groin. [ TSN ]
Now the Wings have an excuse when they get bounced.


:: GDubs at [Deadspin] found this.

It warrants repeating:
:: Who has the hottest ice girls? [PuckThatHit]

The Pens Patrol has a solid showing in the top 5.
The leaders right now are the Blackhawks:

Sold

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STOREBLOG

Some recent additions:

A new WWGRD shirt.
We, like some others, brought the WWGRD shirts and are fine with them.
Some people said the lettering was almost green:



Another addition:

Brass Of A Riverboat Gambler


Coming this weekend:


Commit to the Stoosh

As always, suggestions are welcome.

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::[Barry Melrose Rocks ] found this videoblog that some Leaf fan does:



A real sad look at what Maple Leafs fans are up to.
Kind of funny though.

:: National Hockey League Fans Association? It exists. [ Hockey News ]

:: Eric Duhatschek loves the rumored outdoor game at Yankee Stadium. [ Globe and Mail ]
Solid read at [ Fanhouse ] too.

There are worse things than hockey being the last sporting event in Yankee Stadium.

Just imagine the outrage if a 60-year-old celebrity was allowed
to put on a Yankees uniform for a baseball game.

Oh wait.

People born after 1990, thoughts?

"Billy Who?"

These ballplayers work 24/7/365 to beat the near-impossible odds of making it to the Big Leagues.
Wouldn't you be offended if Billy Crystal strolled up to the plate and you were pitching?

Pirates should have bean his ass.

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10

Go Pens

Don't Stop Believin'

Yea everyone knows.

But still.....

March 13, 2007




Thanks again 66

In Short. PENS WIN.

7 - 3

[ NHL.com RECAP ]

Injuries are so bad right now,
GM Ray Shero got a high stick to the face in a pickup game before the Pens game.

But you know what...

Shero got stitched up, put on a $4,000 dollar suit...

And he made it through the game.

That's what we're all about right now.

The "battling through injures" thing has become a broken record,
but it must always be recognized.

The Pens generated their biggest offensive output of the season
against a team playing for their playoff lives.

If a lot of us hadn't witnessed Buffalo fans firsthand back on January 1,
you'd almost feel bad for the Sabres.

But we don't feel bad for anyone.

Flashblackblog:
2005-06 season





Eat it.


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ANTHEM

[Double B]

[Doube R]-------------------------[Matt J]

[Unknown]------------------------------------[Captain Dummy]

[demondg1]-------------------------------------[Dave P.]

[Paul]

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FIRST PERIOD

Well, son of a bitch.

On a night when the Haitian had a chance of seeing time on the fourth line, Tyler Kennedy scores his first goal since 1940 to make it 1-0 right out of the gate.

do it

JFK smoked Pittsburgh's own Mike Weber.
Thankfully we were sent his fourth-grade yearbook picture:

[Thanks to Nick Z for the pic]

Mike must have skipped on the day they taught how not to get burned on a breakaway.

The Pens had to sell their condo on Cloud Nine when Connor James was sent to the box for tripping.
It turned out the Pens were more more dangerous shorthanded than the Sabres were on the PP.

After the James penalty was killed, Patrick Kaleta, the penultimate joke, carried the puck into the Pens zone.
But yet, he is a joke.
Conks with the easy save.

...................

Cotton Candy Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeere

[Double R]

......................................................

The rest of the first consisted of jobbing, 24/7.

Pascal Dupius was everywhere.
Just a solid player.

Power plays, power plays, power plays.
Someone out there on Planet Earth was having sex during that first period, while a lot of us were watching a boring segment of an ice-hockey game.

If you accomplished both, we'll give you 5 bucks.

...........................................................................

SECOND PERIOD

The second period started with the Ty Conklin Show making the saves he had to.

What happened next is what changes seasons.
It's what instills confidence and what demoralizes brains.

Georges Laraque pulls a driveby elbowing on Nathan Paetsch.

Thank God that guy got up.

We don't know what year exactly that the Pens switched the TV cameras from the bench side to the penalty-box side, but highlights of Game 7 against the Islanders confirm that the elbow didn't occur in Kevin Stevens Corner.

A much-deserved 5-minute penalty to Laraque opened the doors for Buffalo.
Too bad they were doors to an outhouse.

The Buffalo Sabres are 4 points out of the playoffs.
They are playing with desperation every game.

They're a solid team, but during the early parts of that major penalty, they couldn't even set up shop in the Pens zone.

And after half of the penalty was killed, Evgeni Malkin dropped acid on the bench and probably blacked out.

He probably doesn't even remember what he did on that PK.
He was stealing the puck, setting up a futile one-timer, stealing the puck again, getting tripped, got a drink at McGrogan's TapRoom, stealing it again, went to a Sheetz and made an MTO for someone, came back and got a shot off.

For whatever reason, the ice opened up every time a Penguin touched it.
Those 5 minutes pretty much ended Buffalo's season, even though it was still 1-0.

Just an unreal shorthanded effort...

The most inspiring shorthanded performance since the drummer from Def Leppard.
yessssss

A rousing cheer from the Mellon faithful after the PK was answered by the Pens when Jeff Taffe jobs one in. 2-0.

After Conklin further displayed that he was in the zone, he gets tripped up, and the Pens head onto the power play.

Gonch from way downtown.

Boomshakalaka

3-0.

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THIRD PERIOD

If there was anything to learn from the Maple Leafs comeback against Philly, it's that a 3-0 deficit in the third means nothing.

The Sabres didn't get the memo, as some jobber Pratt nails Staal from behind into the boards.
A Whatev PP on the way.

And it was just bad news for them.
Ryan Malone makes an unreal play to pick the pocket of a Sabre, and then Petr Sykora scores probably the easiest goal of his life.
The look on his face is great as Malone greets him.

4-0.
...........................................................................

Cotton candy Heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

[unkown]

...........................................

The Pens may have eased up a little after that 4th goal, and it was probably the reason Burn in Jochen Hecht was able to put a hot potato home. 4-1.

Hecht karmalized himself when he went to the box soon after.
But it was a blessing in disguise, since the Sabres scored a HUGE shorty to make it 4-2.

But the Sabres couldn't smell blood.
They smelled a perfume of dominance.

The Pens kept pressuring and eventually got awarded with another PP when Staal got hooked by Tallinder.

And again, the Sabres pay.
Seeing the replay from behind Sydor at full speed, it was just an unreal deflection.
Malkin gets it in.

5-2.

Somebody over at LGP loved the next goal.
Chris Minard makes the most of his 11 seconds of ice time to get a big goal that he'll get to talk about next week when he's back in WB/S. But still, it's his first NHL goal.

6-2.

Man, this was how the '80s were.
Buffalo's Thomas Vanek came back and scored.

6-3.

Oh wait. That wasn't Thomas Vanek. Our bad.
You'd just think someone who is making $7mill a year would actually show up.

Oops.

The weirdest part was that there was still 9:00 left in the game.

And then the Refs started fixing the game.
Some crap goes down in front.
Conk keeps the puck out. The Sabres players raise their arms.
No dice.
Play goes on, but after an offsides we go to the war room.

[Chris R.]

The replay was inconclusive.
If the game was in Buffalo, the goal judge turns the light on, and it's a goal.
But too bad. It's not.

And as the universe goes, the Penguins go down 25 seconds after the goal is waved off, and Letang puts one home on the rush. 43-9.

[Brenna]
P.S. -- We may owe this guy 5 bucks

There was still 7:00 left.

The Sabres score an obvious goal, but it gets waved off due to the quickest whistle in hockey history.

Lindy Ruff was speechless.
The Refs give a limited explanation.
If we ran Sabresblog, we'd be up in arms.

Hopefully it comes out that some NHL ref has a gambling problem.
They trace it back to this game and realize he took the Pens at -1 1/2.

The annoying "LET'S GO BUFFALO" chant we heard a million times at the Winter Classic were thrown back in Buffalo's mouth down the homestretch when a "GO HOME BUFFALO" chant tried valiantly to get going.

The Pens put in Natrone Means to run out the clock.

Conklin owns Buffalo.

GAME.

STATS

• Dupuis: 2A
• Gonch: 1G, 1 A
• Kennedy: 1G, 2A
• Letang: 1G, 1 A
• Sykora: 1G, 1A
• Sydor: 2A
• Malkin: 1 G ( Snore )
• Conkblock: 29/32
  

MISCELLANEOUS

• Jordan Staal will score the biggest goal of the Pens season.
• Chris Minard won't.
• Jeff Taffe = Vital Cog
• Daryl Sydor. All he does is get the puck on net.
  
• Did the Pens get lazy late? If so, they get a pass.
• The USS Hal Gill = Solid while almost scoring shorthanded.
  

10

BirthDay ( 71 ) -- Sabres @ Pens

Perhaps it's fate that it's almost a year to the day that Lemieux announced the Pens were staying.
They played Buffalo that night.


And Buffalo's in town tonight again.

7:30

Crosby felt something in his ankle at practice this morning and will not be playing tonight.
Talbot's not playing.

Petr Sykora, a warrior, when hearing the Crosby was gonna be out,
decided to suit up despite back pains.

Maybe 'cause he's helped carry the Pens for the past 50 days.

All Downhill From Here

March 12, 2007

In early March of 2007, the Penguins future was so much up in the air
that we had even registed a new address on blogspot that we were gonna use to cover the entire NHL.

But on March 12, our lives changed forever.
[ News Story ]

However, that was nothing compared to what was coming on March 13.

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:: Congrats to [ Penguins.NHL.com ]
#1 in traffic among NHL sites for January.

:: Ross McKeon at Yahoo has the Pens at #8. [ Yahoo ]

Ranked #0 in life


:: Eaton is out. Scuderi is out.
Brooks Orpik gets some love for filling the gap. [ PG ]


Crosby's gonna be on one of 10 covers
commemorating ESPN Magazine's 10-year anniversary. [ PG ]

:: Crosby-esque money awaits Malkin in his new contract. [ The Hockey News ]
:: Someone finally says Malkin is a candidate for MVP. [ Burnside ESPN ]

:: Do you know who Jason Botterill is? We didn't either.
He watches the bottom line of the Pens salary cap.

Apparently, he's been dodging the issue of signing Hossa. [ National Post ]

..............................................................................................
Speaking of Hossa...

Sunday looks like a return. [Penguins.com]


Good read.
Especially this part:

"I don’t like to guess because then you put dates in people’s heads, especially my own. I don’t want there to be a date,” he said. “I just want to know that I am 100 percent. To play my game, I can’t go out there at 80 percent and think I am going to be effective. I am just going to hurt them team if I go out there and am anything less than 100 percent. Especially with an injury like this, it’s one where you tend to avoid contact. And that’s something I am not going to be able to do.”

-Gary Roberts

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It seems like yesterday it was just January.
It was colder than balls.

Now it's starting to feel like playoff hockey.

We are starting to see our last snowfalls.

The sun is creeping through your bedroom window a little earlier.
Before you know it, you'll be wondering the streets in shorts after a devastating playoff loss.

Right now, the Pens are sitting comfortably.
But there are fanbases who can't sleep at night during these times.

Two huge games last night in the East:

At one end of the Conference standings...


4 - 3 OVERTIME

[ TSN ]

The Maple Leafs have their backs to the wall.
Going into a home-and-home series with Philly, they had to take both.

1:12 into the third period, Daniel Briere put the Flyers up 3-0.
The Leafs were done.



But without warning, the Leafs came back and tied it,
which set up a crazy ending.

On a powerplay late and not wanting the Flyers to get a point, as the Leafs are trying to catch them, Toronto pulls their goalie in a tied game, and they almost put one home.

They eventually won it in OT.
Huge game in Philly tonight.

-------------------------------

In a battle on the other end of the spectrum,
Montreal and New Jersey played on Versus.


4 - 0
[ TSN ]

If you were told the final score of this game was 4-0, you'd think of a Devils victory.
Negative.

Consisting of nothing out of the ordinary,
the Habs reclaim #1 in the East with a huge win on home ice.

Saku Koivu before training camp, thoughts?
“We’ll make the playoffs this season, but don’t expect us to win the Stanley Cup.”


Jaroslav Spacek and Dmitri Kalinin are out. [ TSN ]


The Lightning tell Andre Roy to take a week off
as a result of that crap with Philly's Riley Cote. [ TSN ]

......................................



Rumors were circulating after the Winter Classic
that the Pens and Flyers would rumble at Penn State.

If the NHL would give Crosby two outdoor games in a row, Pittsburgh might be bombed.



So, thankfully, the NHL is leaning towards a game in Yankee Stadium on January 1, 2009.
Some people don't want a hockey game to be the last sporting event there.

-- Some guy doesn't like it. [ North Jersey.com ]
-- Sean at [ Going Five Hole ] isn't one of those people.

.......................................................................



:: The NHL will be part of a new on-demand video service online.
Regular-season games, classic games, and highlights for free. [ Hulu.com ]
-- Thanks to [ Kukla's Korner ] with the link.

:: [ Windor Star ] finds who is overpaid in the NHL.

:: David Amber at [ ESPN ] looks at the best 10 NHLers under 6'0", 200 pounds.

..................................................

The hardest working man in blogging, Seth at [Empty Netters] found this:



:: [Mirtle M.D] with the playoff push

:: Eric McErlain at [Fanhouse] has Backstrom's reaction to the own goal.
As he notes the goal reminded a lot of people of this:


...................................

We're glad to have Charlie back.

When Hossa came over at the trading deadline,
we informed Charlie in a text message that he was gonna be taken out of Flashblog.

Charlie burst into our offices the next day and was irate.
We suggested that he take some time off.

He took our suggestion grudgingly and went on a trip around the world.









....................................

Wikipedia Editing Is Running Wild


Fedko's page was on lockdown after we made this edit to it on September 1, 2007.

But someone out there is at it again. [ Fedko Wiki ]

*For some reason, Blogspot wasn't letting us upload the picture that was sent in.

....................................

Hey we make mistaykes all the time.
We're morons who happen to own computers.

We're not part of one of the biggest websites on the planet, so we get away with it...
Unless commentor Cripplr44 stops banging his mom and reads a post.

But Yahoo? They are a mess.


How does that even get past the editor?

Many people sent that one in.

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CALL TO ARMS

If anyone lives in the Washington Plaza Apartments building
and has a window facing Mellon Arena, shoot us an e-mail.


14

A possible 4-point change looms tonight.

Pittsburgh Post-Gazette's Effect On Man

Post-Gazette does photoshops now.
And it's solid.


Ed Yozwick -- PG

The Power Play Woes [ PG ]

..........................................................................

Everybody's injured. [ PG ]

Talbot is out
Sykora is out
Hossa is still out

You probably know all that by now anyway

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Ron Hextall = Maniac

1990 And Beyond: The Penguin Goaltender

The ice-hockey goaltender.
If he doesn't have a short memory, your team is done.

He sits at the other end of the ice after giving up a cheap goal...

And that goal is the only thing he's thinking about.
He keeps reliving it in his head.

Oh, crap, here they come on another two-on-one.

"How would you like it at your job if whenever you made a small mistake,
a red light flashed over your desk, a horn blared, and 17,000 people stood up and yelled at you?"
-- Jacques Plante

Since 1990, the Pens have been looking for a go-to netminder.
Join us as we go through every goalie to appear in a Pens uniform over the last 18 years.

Brad Tolliver, honorable mention.

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#35 -- TOM BARRASSO

[ Game-by-Game Results and Career Stats ]
[ Wiki ]

[ Geocities ] [ Tripod ] [ MySpace ] [ Barrasso Bio ]


Tommy B. was drafted 5th overall by the Sabres in the 1983 draft, fresh out of high school.
He ended up winning the Vezina Trophy in his first NHL season.

In 5 full seasons with Buffalo, he was anus when it came to showing up in the playoffs,
sporting a 3-8 record, along with a 4.05 GAA and .856 SV%.

Early into the 1988-89 season, Buffalo traded Barrasso along with the eventual draft pick of Joe Dziedzic to the Pens for Doug Bodger and Darrin Shannon.


By the summer of 1992, Tom Barrasso had won two Cups with the Penguins,
recording shutouts in both Stanley Cup Finals.

It's become second nature for Penguins fans to job Barrasso, given Barrasso's propensity to give up cheap goals in big games, such as [ Benoit Hogue and David Volek in 1993 ] and Tom Fitzgerald in 1997.

It didn't help that his relationship with the media was strained:



After 1993, Barrasso's career with the Penguins turns into a fog.


The closest the Pens have gotten to the Stanley Cup since 1992 was the 1995-96 season.
Barrasso gave up the series-deciding goal on a shot from Idaho in Game 7 of the Eastern Conference Finals against Florida.

After posting a 31-14-13 record, 2.55 GAA and .922%, during the 1998 season,
the Pens' playoff run came to an end when he wasn't up to snuff against the Maple Leafs.


Garry Valk in OT ends the season on Mellon ice.

In 2000, at the trading deadline, the Pens were able to get rid of him,
sending him to the Senators for solid goalie Ron Tugnutt and D-man Janne Laukannen.

Barrasso was mud for the rest of his career.
He signed a pro-forma contract with Pittsburgh when he retired,
in order to retire as a Penguin.

-- 2008 --

Despite being #2 all-time in wins amongst U.S.-born goaltenders,
he only saw action in one game in Olympic play.


He helped beat Belarus 8-1 in the 2002 Games.

He had also turned down an offer to play for the 1984 Olympic team,
opting to devote his time towards the Buffalo Sabres instead.

He has the most goalie assists in NHL history, with 48.


As of 2008, he is the goaltending coach for the Carolina Hurricanes.

-- MASKS --




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#40 -- FRANK PIETRANGELO


[ Game-by-Game Results and Career Stats ]
[ Wiki ]

Frankie was selected by the Pens 63rd overall in the 1983 Entry Draft.
He headed off to college and took care of business.

He started seeing considerable action with the Pens in 87-88, playing in 21 games.

In Game 6 of the Pens' first-round matchup against the Devils in the 1991 playoffs,
Frankie got the surprise of his life when Tom Barrasso was a late scratch for the game.

With the Penguins facing elimination in New Jersey,
Frankie served up this:



Overshadowed at 1992 trading deadline by the Mark Recchi trade,
Pietrangelo was sent to Hartford for 20 Micro Machines.


In the 1992 playoffs, Frankie's Whalers faced Patrick Roy's Habs in the first round.

Frankie held his own during the series, posting a 2.68 GAA and .922 SV%.
But the Whale lost in the second overtime of Game 7.