Wednesday, September 3, 2008

Meet Mario Lemule

This is all from [LGP]. We aren't quite sure what to make of it.


There are this things called Zooperstars.

Meet [Mario Lemule].






From ZOOperstars .com:

"This guy's no jackass - it's Mario Lemule! The goofy grinnin' donkey gets really funky when he hits the ice. This guy slips and slides, jumps and jives to the hottest, horse hoovin' hip-hop hits. Mario spends a lot of time in his private stallion stable in a prominent part of the Pittsburgh suburbs. Look out pooper-scoopers...don't step in Mario's manure!"


We have no clue what the hell these things are. But apparently they are like 8 feet tall?

Some other names:

Whale Gretzky, Roger Calmens, Cow Ripken, Jr.

It just goes on and on.

But wait, there is more:




God help us all.



83 comments:

Michael said...

first?

J.S. said...

You guys really spent a SECOND writing a post about Mario Lemule?

stunned

frank said...

I've noticed that Pennsylvania consistently has the most voters on the survey questions that are posted on ESPN's NHL page.

shawnawwwesome said...

What, no Michael Vick Tzu?

sh0ez said...

@ max from last post:

Annie was originally bringing booze. But she can't make it. I don't know if anyone else is bringing anything. I read on the site for the park that a $50 alcohol license must be bought. Something tells me that it wasn't. I don't know how strict the park is. I'll message Amanda about it.

BlacknGold66 said...

That is terrible.

btumpak said...

howard the duck was funnier than this turd

debrisslide said...

This college internet always logs me out of Google randomly, thus impairing my comment abilities.

This may be the most depressing post of the offseason so far. In that it contains zero information and exposes something so tacky and disgusting that it isn't even funny.

Rick said...

Coming soon......Squidney Crosby

Max Power said...

Shit I'll by the license. I'm an American god damn it! I should be able to drink where I want without a permit and clothing should be an option in public and not a requirement!

Steve said...

Those things are like the Tampa Bay mascot that you guys posted a video of a while back. The one who terrorized little kids on the beach...

Beav said...

personally i liked when one of the "zooperstars" ate a human being live on set. Not like that would scare the shit out of small children.

Rage said...

@debris-it's not THAT depressing!!! It's almost no longer the off-season, and really...the whole Mats Sundin thing is more disgusting.

Just sayin'

Max Power said...

hehe the cops had to taze an emu on the turnpike

Dan said...

what. the. fuck?

jefe mays said...

its official. i have pens tickets for the 10/30 game. woooooooooooooo!

satan on devils night. ill say 3 goals 3 assists. dont count on me getting in on time for a anthem pic, but ill try my drunkest, er, damnedest.


@michael -you gotta take first with more confidence than that.

also, the stooper zooperstars better get a vegas show! im so there.

Lady Jaye said...

@sh0ez > Do you doubt my powers? I bought it. I don't drink but I know you guys do. ;) No clue who is bringing the beer, though.

J.S. said...

c'mon, if you're gonna make a zooperstar, how did they leave former Wilkes Barre/Scranton Penguin Peter Ratchuk. You don't even have to change the name.

Keith Tkawoodchuck?
Tomas Raccoun?
Rats Sundin?

I'm stopping.

Lady Jaye said...

Oh, this is our list of stuffs people are bringing to picnicblog so far... let me know if anybody else is bringing something who isn't on Facebook:

http://spreadsheets.google.com/pub?key=p4QU7w6j77lP-4x3zybCsHA

Hip said...

Ohmigod I have to say I laughed. I'm not sure why, but I did!

James said...

HAHA i would love to see them win this thing just to piss the brits off !! HAHA

GO PENS !!

NHL O9 DEMO OUT !!

Chubs said...

The Zooperstars came to a State College Spikes game when I worked there last year...it was, uh, interesting.

The worst was Reggie...if you've ever seen him, you know why.

Brandon said...

Was one of those things supposed to be Harry Caray?

Brilliant.

@Steve...that video of the TB Lightning mascot jobbin' people on the beach is possibly the funniest thing on all the internets...

Adam Sacco said...

i cant believe i just wasted 7 minutes of my life watching that.
americas got embarrassment.
zing.
yeah.

akus said...

Staff said,
Strange post coming at noon
We were warned.
__
People need to get in game shape for these 2 a days.
postherepostthereblog.

__

Billy Mays would never touch a Zooperstars.
--


OILERS 44% (1532 votes)

PENGUINS 56% (1924 votes)
Hell Yeah.

Max Power said...

lady j

I think that they have grills at the park.

jefe mays said...

how many pucks could a keith tkachuk chuck if a keith tkachuk could chuck pucks?

Max Power said...

4 pucks?

Brett said...

I don't care what anyone says, I thought that video was funny.

Pops Freshenmeyer said...

how many pucks could a keith tkachuk chuck if a keith tkachuk could chuck pucks?

Not as many pucks as Walt Tkaczuk could czuk if Walt Tkaczuk could czuk pucks.

TheFandangler said...

I hope everyone understands that there will be at least one of those "Le-mule" things at some game this year...

I guess the solution is to always have a small container of gas with you at all times... and some means of ignition.

Lady Jaye said...

@max power > I'm pretty sure that each shelter does have one. The initial fear was that we'd be the lucky ones with the shelter that doesn't have one. ;)

Allison said...

ahhhhh....
omg!!!
i remember Mario Lemule!!!
During the lockout the WBS Penguins played a game at Nassau Coliseum and during one of the intermissions they had these things come out on the ice...
i remember also there was Roger CLAMenson.

when i get home later, I'm going to try to link pictures from that day

TheNWChica said...

I can has Free Candy?

Allison said...

and staff...
didn't you sign John Stamos during the off season?

justincredibleh said...

They have those zooperstars perform at Penn State men's and women's basketball games each year. Pretty retarded/hilarious to watch.

osheak234 said...

i want to see Squidney Crosby.

LostAdvenger said...

These guys perform at the Altoona Curve a couple times a season. Their performance is pretty funny.

jefe mays said...

is it too late to sign those things up for your picnicblog?

KaylaJ said...

that reminds me of the NHL awards back in 93ish when they said people in texas now know that mary o'lemew isn't some sort of opera singer. i'd say i think i heard crickets after that joke, but its the nhl awards, you already knew that.

and apparently i didn't even have to vote in the ice logo cause the pens are now running away.

akus said...


These guys perform at the Altoona Curve a couple times a season. Their performance is pretty funny.





BoB the Baseball Dog > zooperstars


---

The word over at icethetics is fixed......



oh that and turd. :)

Last night there was NOT one comment before i logged off for the night(10:30 est), of course the Oilers were winning at that time. No surprise that the Oilers are losing and the fixed talk comes out. If it was fixed then why didnt the Oilers walk away with it when they had the lead?
...........as was said, not the first time they blew a lead.



You are right fandangler, turds it is.

akus said...

Ohhhhhhhh, well i left a comment at icethetics and umm, it let me vote again!

Shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Lady Jaye said...

@jefe > No it's not too late, just let us know if you are going and waht you're bringing so we have a head count.

bkuz6219 said...

thats one of the wierdest posts ive seen you guys do buttttttttt with the season almost here i could have cared less ive put on my blinders and im in full countdownblog :-)

Dr. Turkleton said...

Season Ticket Holders....

Tickets will be mailed out next Wednesday the 10th...

...better start cleaning up the place for Sidney's delivery!

sh0ez said...

Preseason tickets are the same price as regular season tickets. LAME.

$99 FOR C-LEVEL IN PRESEASON!

Ugh. I'm gonna see if I can lower the ticket count for that game when I talk to Mike again.

brndlynn said...

that video was bad but I'd watch it a thousand times before I would consider watching the Pilthy fan video again.

brndlynn said...

for anyone who's interested:
the Pens website has new wallpapers with the 08-09 schedule.

dlonlo said...

does anyone know if u can buy 6-pack mini plans without being on the season ticket waiting list? If so when do the go on sale?

Ian said...

Pens are up by 560 votes at Icethetics. WOOOOOOOOOOOO

shawnawwwesome said...

The Pens reward the ant, punish the grasshopper. You should prepare for winter by getting on the waiting list.

In lieu of that, scale the outside of the Arena to try to catch the game through gaps in the roof.

jefe mays said...

@lady jaye -lol i meant you should hire lemule and the zooperstars for picnicblog.

ill be even further away this weekend than usual. in san fran, possibly taking in a pirates game woooooooo!

coffeytalk said...

for those attending picnicblog-

I have lived by North Park for most of my life and have been to many of their pavilions. Most do have grills, however, I recommend bringing your own. They aren't the nicest or cleanest.

Also, since this pavilion has electricity I suggest someone bringing some party lights or something cause when it gets dark, it gets RAPEY dark.

I am sad I won't be there. I'm leaving town on Friday and won't be back til Sunday afternoonish.

Have a pensblogarrific time! Drink one for me!

coffeytalk said...

also, i posted this tidbit in the last post but thought i should move it here:

No NPH?

Aw come on!

And I'm not talking Harold and Kumar NPH bullshit. I'm talking How I Met Your Mother NPH.

LEGEN...wait for it...DARY


and:

On the drafting side of things, as an agent of tPB, I am still pulling for my man, Ash. He knows how to take a hit and always pulls through in any circumstance. I have a few interested parties but tPB is my main goal. I also represent a few more possibilities. I'll send STAFF the full write-ups on these prospects.

But for now,

Hail to the King, baby

the end.

Jonny Van Mundegaarde said...

Mario Lemule...just...wow...

And a plea to thepensblog staff, try to refrain from the politic mentions and/or photoshops in your posts. I have to sit idly by at work and at my clinical site while people gush about the Messiah, I need a place I can escape all of that. I don't care if seeing the Almighty with a Flyers hat on makes you puke. Keep it to yourself.

curtO. said...

tPB = Nothing off limits

Rules are rules...

Toju - Balls of Steel It get's funnier with each bit.

eileenover said...

I agree, no more politicsblog. It gets old really fast.

Jawsh said...

Still holding out hope for Dr. Alan Grant

Also

Zordon, Megatron, Indiana Jones, Dave Thomas, Edgar Snyder, the 90-20 guys, Billy Mays, kenan and kel, Lu Kang, and of course...

Rufio.


Rufio.

RU-FI-OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Billkamm said...

BREAKING NEWS! I was reading the site and it says Coming Soon: Squidney Crosby!!!!

http://www.zooperstars.com/ZOOper_Show.asp

Jonny Van Mundegaarde said...

jawsh, huge pick with Megatron, but the 90/20 guys?!? Are u friggin' serious? Someday I will make a point to go to one of their dealerships and string them along far enough to where as putting pen to paper, I ask them, "Say, aren't you the guys with that commercial with that annoying ass dude screaming ninety-twentyyyyyyyyy?" "Yeah? Peace out, dorks."

Dr. Turkleton said...

Brass Balls:

Veep Palin > King Shero.

I think Biden might lose some hair plugs if/when he debates her.


sorry...I know cblog shouldn't be inundated with issues that shape our country and should be more about relevant topics: Midgets.

jokes.

akus said...

I agree curto, i think(could be wrong) the staff stated one time in a post,
tPB = Nothing off limits

If there is something in tPB/comments, i dont wanna read i scrooooooooooool.
Just as i did with the Sidney/Mario Zooshit.

I learned not to sweat the small shit.
--

Sons of Anarachy, interesting.-
---
@ picnicblog, on Saturday,i know they are calling for an all day rain here in Central Pa, as a result of Hannah. Hope it keeps away from Western Pa.

--

@rage,
I think You need a bigger hammer for the interwebz.

Or turn those yellowjackets loose on it. NOW, that's an idea!!

KaylaJ said...

"rapey dark", i like that. we have windchimes on the front porch and i call them rape chimes cause they sound like something you'd hear right before someone gets attacked.

sh0ez said...

Rape chimes is quite possibly the most disturbing and amazing thing I have ever heard.

eileenover said...

Shelters are usually good for keeping rain out.

coffeytalk said...

rape chimes is my new favorite thing.

unless i hear them when walking down a dark alley...

jefe mays said...

billy mays could sell rape chimes.

"order now and ill even throw in a brand new Rapey Dark dvd...."

fleuryous said...

Brooks Orca.
Matt Cougar.


DO IT.

Dr. Turkleton said...

jefe...

if you're heading up to The City this weekend...make sure you stop at Daddy's in The Castro for a quickie.

Tell them Sheldon Kennedy sent you!

FYI:

Want to piss the locals off? They ♥ it when you call The City, San Fran or Frisco!

Jonny Van Mundegaarde said...

curto and akus, I do believe the staff pretty much made it a rule not to post about our players' private lives. So there's one thing that's off limits. And akus, i'm familiar with the scrollllll. I use it on pretty much all of your posts, obviously except that one.

I always had an unkown fear of windchimes. Thank you Kayla for justifying the fear haha.

Dr. Turkleton said...

jonny v....

ZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

KaylaJ said...

you're welcome johnny, and if you just think you have a fear, i have to park on the street at the end of a very dark cul-de-sac. i guess i just should be happy 99% of summer days don't have any wind.

jefe mays said...

oh boy i cant wait to go to Daddy's up there in Frisco. thanks Turk!

Annie said...

Dr. Turk @ 12:33 - was that an Eddie Izzard reference? If so, A+++++!

brndlynn said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
brndlynn said...

zing indeed.

dont remember if this was posted or not but the final poll results were:
OILERS 42% (1650 votes)
PENGUINS 58% (2245 votes)
very nicely done cblog.

Johnny Wrath said...

Billy Mays selling "rape chimes" is so, so funny...

When that creature ate that man, I was laughing hysterically. It added to the sense that nobody in the building knew what was going on. I wanna see Yaku Koivu, Rabbit Vrbata, and of course Sharkko Ruutu.

-Cheers

sh0ez said...

@ brandi: You should read the comments.Oilers fans think it's a conspiracy and that the vote was rigged. Ha ha.

akus said...

Words of wisdom.

Some shit does get really old.
Yesssssssss,it does.


Keep it to Yourself.

Seems its easier to type about it than it is to do it!

-
One day a man went into a store and told the owner he did not like what he was selling.The owner just smiled,knowing the man had other stores to shop if he didn't like the options.

If it's my store then i make the rules.
If, that is, it is mine.

fleuryous said...

Oh, Sidney Crosby pegged as the "whiner."

I didn't hear him whine once during the SCF, did you?


No, he was too busy being MONEY. and banging your girlfriend.

Just get over it, you lost...I mean they are used to it anyway, right?

poneil2005 said...

I hate everything about that video. Seriously.

Whistler said...

I've worked with the professionally and let me tell you, this is about it. There act is pretty lame and they do the same things over and over and over and over. I'm glad to seem them get some national TV attention, but if you've seen them at a baseball game you'll not see much different.

raisedtotherafters.com said...

Does anyone see a problem with Squidney Crosby being added to zooperstars.com? That's insult to injury if you ask me. After all, what is the poor sea creature that the Red Wings fans throw on the ice during the playoffs? That's right, an Octopus, also known as a Squid. I am writing these people a note stating that the Crosby character is poorly timed, and I wish for you all to do the same.

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