Sunday, December 23, 2007


[pit.<span class=[<span class=

[ recap]

In its simplest form, to the ordinary person.
It is a mere question of little importance.

But in our universe.

"What Would Gary Roberts Do," is not a question.
It is a statement.
It is a mindset.

A statement few can understand, and a mindset only one can have the power explain.

What Would Gary Roberts Do?

Be a beast.


A rumor started by Larry Brooks, so-called writer from the NY Post, says Gary Roberts has asked the Penguins for a trade.

Look Larry Brooks is about as reliable as the condom that broke on his Dad.
He is everything that is wrong with modern day journalism.

So if you want to believe him, go ahead.

First Period

Steiggy and Errey started everything off by reminding us that Chara has a long stick.

He ended using that long stick to throw it at the net.
Conklin can't handle it, PJ Axelsson was there to put it home.
It looked bad.

You can't shake the feeling that Conk seems apathetic towards everything.

They had to call up the War Room in Toronto to look at a high stick.
We're told that it's the first time that Mellon Arena has had a direct line to Toronto.
Or maybe we heard that wrong.
Or maybe we don't care.

Later, JFK knocks a piece of glass loose near the Pens locker-room entrance.
Solid work by the glass repair guys.
That is big time pressure.

Ference went to the box later on for JFK.
Then Wideman slashes Malkin's stick in two.
The Pens had a 5-on-3 for 1:30.

They spent about a minute to set up Malkin with two blasts.
One was blocked, the other one went right into Auld's balls.

Unreal. The entire powerplay goes by the wayside.

Picture: Some gay Allegheny Power workers attempt to restart the Penguins powerplay. They are disappointed to find the solution is not making out with each other

After a while, Sid tries to go coast-to-coast and almost buries it.
Colby grabs up the rebound and can't do it either.
The play ends with the Pens going to the box. That's just how it's been lately.
The penalty was a slashing penalty on Bing.

The Pens survive it.
Bad times.

Second Period

To start the second period, the Pens came out buzzing.
They had to weather some Bruins crap.

And then it finally happened.

Back to the neighborhood we go.
On this weeks episode Mr. BGL goes into his office and finds Roberts in front.
Best goal of the season.

The goal changes the game. And the lives of 3,000 or so Turkish people who are killed by the aftershock.

Later, some Bruin charges into Sydor, putting the Pens on a big PP.

When it looked like the Pens were out of sorts, they finally got it together.
Gonchar kept it in the zone, Staal grabs it up.

Over to Malkin for a one-timer.
Put it where mama keeps the the cookies.

Top shelf.

30 seconds later, our favorite line connected again.
Call it the NWO line.

Roberts comes down the wing and gets it to Larauqe charging to the net.
You have to love the BGL celebration.

Uh-oh. Two-goal lead.
The only thing you could count on less is Michael J Fox being your partner in a game of Jenga.

[Credit to this photoshop goes here ]

Marco Sturm is a joke.
He slew-foots Eaton behind the Pens net.
Eaton is a warrior.
He does not return to the game after the second intermission.
God help us all.

The rest of the second it mud.
The Bruins try to get something going.
No dice.

Conk-block city.

[Thanks to whoever coined that phrase in C-blog]

Third Period

The third was all about survival.
You have to be able to hold onto a 3-1 lead at home.
If you can't. Then you are not going anywhere.

Conk-blog was in few mode, holding down the fort.
Midway through the third Rutuu almost slashes the throat of Alex Auld.

Very scary situation.
The mask Auld had on clearly saved him.
If that would have been Hasek.

Back to the action.
Malkin gets called for a trip.
But the penatly kill is solid.

Later on the Pens get a chance to ice the game, but the powerplay flutters.

Father time enters the building. And Claude Jullien knows it.
Next thing you know, it is almost under a minute.
The Bruins are flying.

Uh oh.

Some jerk scores.
Picture: Claude Joke-iun poops himself during the timeout.

The next seconds are the longest of our lives.
But somehow bing gets it.
He rings it off the post.

The puck waits in the crease.
And a silence comes over the Bruins bench.
A grizzled vet glides to the puck.

With the charm of a 40-year-old salesman.

Gary Roberts closes the deal.



  • Roberts: 2G, 1A
  • BGL: 1G,1A
  • Malkin: 1G
  • EC: 2A

  • Where is Orpik?
  • It appears we only recap wins now. Fairweatherblog?
  • Solid win, much needed.
  • Malkin goal was special
  • EC is really starting to play up to his potentional.
  • Kind of miss Ryan Malone.
  • Bruins are riddled with injuries.


stokes said...

Two quality lines in the second period recap:

"The goal changes the game. And the lives of 3,000 or so Turkish people who are killed by the aftershock."

"The only thing you could count on less is Michael J Fox being your partner in a game of Jenga."


Staff, its tough to get up game after game when the outcome sucks half the time. I dont know how the players do it. Dont sweat it; it'll all come around soon enough. Great post.

Good win by the Pens. and since the east is a bloody mess, we're back in the playoffs right now!!!

Merry Christmas Cblog.

Eric said...

I dont know if it is just me, but I have been saying this from last season and not very many people agree with me, and game after game I fail to see their argument. Rob Scuderi is the Pens worst defenseman. It seems like he is always out there when the other team scores, yet his +/- is even (before today's game) which is hard to beleive. Sydor is a -7 which isnt that hard to beleive because he hasnt impressed either. All the hype about Sydor being an offensive defenseman when the Pens picked him up in the off season... he has 2 points.
Enough ranting, my question is how do Scuderi and Sydor continue to dress over Orpik?? Orpik doesnt contribute much offensively, but no one expects him to. He does what he is supposed to do, play physical defense in front of the net and on the boards. I just dont see MT's logic in dressing these two jobbers over Brooks.

The Hebrew Hammer said...

I almost fell out of my chair when I read the Michael J. Fox Jenga line.

Anonymous said...

So i was getting autographs after the game and gary rolled up in his car. I was looking through my bag of stuff and was like, crap i dont have anything. Then i looked to my wrist, my WWGRD wristband. I asked him to sign it and he asked what it was. I told him it meant what would gary roberts do and he laughed and signed it. Then he said how he loved the phrase :)

jill said...

"The only thing you could count on less is Michael J Fox being your partner in a game of Jenga."

I love you.

Anonymous said...

michael j. fox photoshop = not cool
the man gave us the back to the future trilogy, he deserves to be let alone at the very least

John said...

Scuderi is a very reliable solid defenseman. He isn't flashy, he's scrappy, and they need that. He's the Max Talbot of the defense. Also, he rarely takes penalties.

I think Orpik does have a place on the ice ... we just don't have any outstanding defensemen. They're all close to "good" and not great.


blufftalk said...

  I can't be happier knowing that Gary Roberts now knows what WWGRD means.

Anonymous said...


You couldn't be more wrong.
Scuderi is even, while Orpik is a -2. Sydor is a -7 but he is a veteran who provides much more offenive skill than Orpik. I like Orpik and I'm sure he will find his way back into the line up (Eaton got hurt today so we will see).

What games are you watching? Scuderi has played good all year? Its funny how word out mouth makes people hate a particular player. If you feel Scuderi has played bad I would start watching the games a little more closely.

meecrofilm said...

"Some gay Allegheny Power workers attempt to restart the Penguins powerplay. They are disappointed to find the solution is not making out with each other"

Thank you for that. Good comeback post after the healthy scratch that was the Islanders game. We all go through slumps. Way to come back with the A-game. That's the sign of a quality blog.

Good to see EC is finally playing well at center. With the 3rd line being money, what do you do when Malone and Talbot come back? Put malkin back centering the 2nd line, with staal on his wing, or with staal centering the 3rd line, or keep malkin with sid and strengthen the wings of the other lines via malone and maybe talbot, or.. well, you get the point.

Coaches have a few important decisions coming up soon.

Anonymous said...

so i was looking at the gary roberts/mr rogers photoshop, then read the part about BGL in his office. Steigy and errey are all about BGL and his "office." Maybe we could see some BGL/Office photoshops, seems like they could work...

jammer jagger said...

eric. Not very many people agree with you because you are wrong.

Dave P said...

witnessed Roberts signing the wristband while standing in the freezing wind. The man signed autographs for a solid 20 mins. what a human being.

Anonymous said...

scruds last year was always in the wrong spot at the wrong time. he knocked in at least 3 goals last year.

but i agree with john. he isnt flashy and is just a solid d man this year.


Anonymous said...


wilsmith said...

to Eric:

Scuderi is reliable. Orpik is constantly out of position. Laying a semi-big hit every 8th game does not make you a physical defenseman, and that's what Orpik does. When he does take the body, it's at the wrong time and he takes himself out of the play.
If you don't notice Scuderi on the ice, then he's doing his job.

That said, no matter what defenseman would get scratched, someone could make an argument that they don't deserve it. You could also make the argument that any one of them (Well, besides Gonch and Eaton) could be scratched, it's just not a good situation on the defense right now.

and why do we have the most boring and least creative power play in the league? I've seen high school teams run a better power play than the Pens. There's a book out on stopping them, and MT is the only one that doesn't know about it. I know they got some PP goals the past few games, but they weren't actual power play-style goals, if that makes sense to anyone out there.

and about that Brooks article: I've never heard of the guy, does he really just print misinformation? Where would he come up with the idea that they asked for trades?

Maverick said...

I have not commented on C-blog for awhile, but I feel like I need to do so now to defend what Eric is saying. I hated on Scuderi last year and was baffled as to why he was on our roster to begin the year. Now he played well at the beginning of the year and I thought well maybe it was because he played with Melichar. I was at the game today, and have been watching lately that all Scuds does is run around our own zone. Most of the times when we go 3 or 4 minutes without getting the puck out of the zone he and Sydor are on the ice. It happened a couple times in todays game. I cannot find any justification in BOTH Sydor and Scuderi being in the line-up over Orpik. Now obviously me and Eric are in the minority on this but I've heard these sentiments from a lot of other people I watch the games with. Oh and I watch ever game, so don't come at me with a "you need to watch more games then" because It won't apply to me.

Stoosh said...


1. I love the Malkin "Top Shelf" photoshop. There's something genius about that image that just cracks me up.

2. Have to agree with the Hebrew Hammer's reaction to the MJF Jenga picture. I didn't want to laugh, but sometimes you just can't help it.

3. Larry Brooks - Apparently, it's well known around the NHL that Brooks isn't exactly aces when it comes to checking sources, so players, management types and even other journalists will deliberately misinform him from time to time just to see what makes it into the paper.

4. Sydor wasn't an offensive defenseman in the same mold as Gonchar, Whitney or Letang...he hasn't put up numbers like that in quite a while (2000-01, to be exact). He does have some offensive tendencies - particularly his ability to carry the puck out of the zone and also execute longer breakout passes from deep in the Pens' defensive zone.

5. Wilsmith's comments on Orpik are dead-on. For a player who was initially projected to be a stay-at-home defenseman when he was drafted, his positioning in his own zone is awful and he couldn't find his way around the PK if you handed him a map and pointed him in the right direction. The fact that they're willing to throw Whitney and Gonchar out there ahead of Orpik on the PK is a pretty telling indictment of his abilities in that department.

Orpik is going to be an unrestricted free agent this summer along with Malone and Eaton. They can't bring everyone back. If Eaton is OK and I'm Ray Shero, I'm at least shopping Orpik right now to see what I could get for him.

He seems to carry a reputation around the league as a stay-at-home d-man, but he's really not any more of a stay-at-home d-man than Kasparaitis was. He's certainly not in the same style of Eaton and Scuderi.

Shero did well by dealing Welch before people could find out he really wasn't as good as his reputation that preceded him. He could do the same thing with Orpik.

Griswold00 said...

Happy Holidays from Fleury29 to everyone on The Pensblog staff and all the Commentorblog regulars!

Mario Christmas to all, and to all a good night! (Except for the Hebrew Hammer, Happy Hanukkah (even though it's over now. Sorry I'm late.)

Chelsea said...

that's a character post. solid job, staff.

and merry christmas to cblog :)

wilsmith said...

Does anyone have a video of this game? particularly the part where Eaton gets slewied.

Hooks Orpik said...


I agree with you on Sydor, but disagree about Orpik.

Sydor, at this stage of his career, is not an offensive defenseman. He's decent at moving the puck, but doesn't assert himself as much as a guy like Whitney or Gonchar.

Orpik, is a physical defenseman. A guy like Scuderi or Eaton is staying in the lineup over him because they play the system better.

This doesn't mean Orpik is poor positionally, I think the coaching staff is more comfortable with a more vanilla player like Scuderi who's not going to take any chances whatsoever.

In today's NHL coaches like structure and playing within the system; Orpik looks for the hit and will do more than he should.

Plus I think he's being punished for misplaying that 2 on 1.

Bottom line is, I don't think the Penguins need to shop him. A good NHL team needs defensive depth exactly for times like this (when a defenseman gets hurt).

Guys like Christensen and Armstrong have been healthy scratches in stretches and when they got back in the lineup they've responded and played generally very well in their roles.

Hopefully Orpik can respond in a similiar manner. It's unfortunate Eaton looks seriously injured, but this is a good chance for him to show that he can play in the manner the organization wants him too. Everyone would benefit.

Eric said...

thank you maverick, the "you need to watch games more closely" response is about as solid of a comeback as "i know you are but what am i." not everyone notices the same things watching the games, thats the great thing about Cblog is you can come here and hear what people pick up on that you had no idea was going on. im not hating on Scuds, he can be solid at times, i've just noticed throughout the season, the majority of the goals the opponent scores, #4 is standing in front of our net.
on another note, im going to the Caps game on the 27th, ive been to the Caps/Pens games twice last year and going again this week, and everytime i go i am less and less impressed with OVugly. Anyone else think he just folds under the pressure of playing against Sid, or is he just overhyped because his team sucks?

nu said...

Of course, GR is the first star for the night.
The NHL decides to properly acknowledge this by cancelling all games for the next two days.

That's respect.

Lady Jaye said...

Good come back guys. Happy Christmas to all... and to me a good night as soon as I get the darned presents out of hiding and under the tree...

Also, I agree that Scuds is doing his job if you don't notice him. I don't think he's a bad d-man at all. I think he and Gonch get a bad rep for whatever reason.

stokes said...

Merry Christmas Cblog!

@ wilsmith: personally, i dont have the tape, but i hope that someone in the Penguins org. does so they may be able to give sturm a late christmas present. that slew foot was absolute bullshit.

@ eric: i think that AHole has talent, but he does play on a shitty team and he's nowhere NEAR the talent that Sid is and will be. i've said it before and this will probably not be the last: he's a sniper and that's about all. i watched the caps/red wings game a few weeks ago and he was a ghost. would i take him on my team? probably. does he have a wicked shot? oh hell yes.

@ nu: nicely done.

everyone have a safe and happy holiday.


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