Thursday, October 4, 2007



As you see, the stats in The Bar have been reset.
It's time.

Stats will be updated at 5:36am every day.

..................................................................

We try to take up zero space in posts to talk about the blog.

But the season is starting, and we want to thank people for hanging out during the offseason.
And we want to welcome people who are experiencing their first season here.
Buckle up.

WE LOVE PHOTOSHOPS.
Every single one will find its way into a recap or into an expo somewhere.

We thought commentorblog was going to wilt away this offseason.
But it did no such thing, even when faced with a terrorist.

Speaking of commentorblog, there are thanks in order.

[SportsBusiness Daily] has ranked the top 10 NHL blogs on the internet.

We sit very nicely at number three. [ Mirtle ]
( Thanks to Gruntov over at LGP, as well )
We were thinking whatev, but then we looked at one of the criteria for the rankings:

Community
A blog's community is a large part of the SBI measurement. While page views and visits are a good indicator of the size of the community, neither is a good indicator of how active a community is. The community measurement takes into account web traffic as well as comments, unique commentators, and response rates along with several other factors.

Without commentorblog, we don't even sniff this list.
With our strict no-ads policy, our only profit from doing this is us knowing that you guys enjoy our shit enough to take some time to comment, do photoshops, send us links, and talk Pens.

But guess what.
There's a big faceoff coming.
And that is what life is all about.

....................................................................

Speaking of Community...


Gameday Chat will be open for business on Friday as well. [ Gameday Chat ]

We will try to have a post set up with links to that,
and something to help people who can't get the Pens game.

More on that Friday, around 4:00.

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[mtl.png]
Montreal won the logo tournament. [ NHLToL ]
The best logo tournament? Or the most-nostalgic-logo tournament?
Regardless, it was a balls-out effort by Chris at that site.

We'd congratulate Montreal, but pixels don't care what's going on.

...................................................

[NHL.com] continues the annual tradition of redoing their website on opening night.



Don't care who you are or where you're from, the new layout is why the internet was invented.

......................................................

PENS

Malkin expects to be better. [ NHL.com ]

"We added two great players," Malkin said. "We should have a great season."

Surprise. Crosby makes the Penguins a threat. [ Yahoo ]

The Trib's season preview of the Pens is out. [ Trib ]


Solid pic.
And solid photoshop job.

Sid -- 5'11"
Staal -- 6'4"
Malkin -- 6'3"
MAF - 6'2"
Whitney -- 6'4"

Gotta love Malkin in that pic.

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[ott.png]
The NHL salary scene may be starting to make sense.
Heatley signs a 6-year, $45 million contract. [ TSN ]
That's $7.5 a year, compared to Sid's $8.7.

Heatley probably deserved more, but no one can afford to spend 1/5 of their cap on one guy.

[phi.png]
PFC Louden Downie has been suspended a month by the AHL. [ TSN ]
*Editors Note*
What a joke.

.........................................

BettmanBlog

He has a lot on his plate. [ TSN ]

"I always like opening night," he said. "It's always fun to come to a game at the Air Canada Centre. It makes you feel like you're in the centre of the universe."

Is it time to start awarding regulation wins with three points? [ TSN ]

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We're too lazy to go find a screenshot, or too stubborn to buy a copy of ESPN the Mag, but ESPN is picking the Rangers over the Penguins in the Atlantic.
Big deal. The teams are so close, and besides, we're talking about New York Rangers here.
Their balls are always wet.

ESPN ranked the facets of each team (defense, special teams, etc.).

Both teams were even in all departments, except for goaltender.
Where Ranger goaltending got a higher ranking than the Pens.

We all know we have a mud backup, but would you rather have Lundqvist or MAF?

Speaking of the Worldwide Leader of Feces,
we found this link to Buccigross' East preview. [ Bucci ]
( Buccigross is money, ESPN is the feces. )

He picked the Pens number one in the Atlantic.
The surprise was seeing Florida at number three, although we're guessing he's predicting playoff seedings.

" Also, the likelihood of Sydor and Sykora being on the team after next season is remote, providing a potential $5 million more to help keep Evgeni Malkin. This is good, smart managing by GM Ray Shero, the kind of managing that will soon lead to a Stanley Cup. "

Speaking of the Panthers....
Canaan found this unreal Panthers commercial for Panera.


..............................................................

SCOREBOARD
[ NHL.com ]


4 - 3
(OT)


Heatley signs the big contract and then goes out and scores the game-winner.
No one faked having a heart attack in Toronto like that jobber did last year.


3 - 2
OT

Saku Joke scores the game winner.
Meaning Carolina will be extra pissed off when the Pens play them.
Go Pens


3 - 2 Shootout

Hasek shut the door in the shootout.

Don't be fooled by the picture.
If you watched the game, you know there was about 200 people there.
Homotown lives up to its billing.


4 - 3


Paul Stastny on pace to score 246 goals.
Colorado is sick.

.....................................................

ATLANTIC DIVISION PREVIEW

1. [pit.png]
Because this isn't RangersBlog.

2. [nyr.png]
The Rangers were busy during the offseason.
They signed Chris Drury and Scott Gomez to deals that would make Donald Trump touch himself.
As with the Penguins, the question mark is the blue line.
They might have to win games this year 6-5 and 5-4.
Those will be W's in the standings, so no one will care.

Remember, last year, they peed on Atlanta, then they were seconds away from taking a 3-2 series lead against Buffalo, but then, ironically, Chris Drury tied it up late.

No one will be taking the Rangers lightly this year.
And they still have Jaromir Jagr.
You know you're old when you realize Jagr will turn 36 years of age this season.
At least he always gets along with his coach.


Poor Ivan

3. [njd.png]
It's good to see the Devils this low.
We could put them fifth if we wanted to.
But that fifth spot is reserved for poop, and the Devils aren't poop.

Because we all really hate the Devils.
And if you really hated poop, your body would be infected within a week.
You have to appreciate poop and what it does for you.
In the same way we appreciate what the Devils will do for us this year by giving us some easy victories.

Unless they win every game 1-0, which facing 5 power plays a night won't always guarantee, the reign of the Devils is over.

Just wait till Brodeur starts showing signs of age.
And when he realizes the guys in front of him aren't what they've been for the past 10 years, we could start seeing it this season.

4. [phi.png]
MMM, the Orange Kool-aid.

All of a sudden, people are in love with Philly because they signed Daniel Briere.
Briere's offensive output in Buffalo was because Buffalo had more than one line for opponents to think about.
We guaranteed a 100-point season from Briere last year, but we're snorting tacos if we think Briere will crack 85 this season.

Philly has a solid number-one goalie with Martin Biron now, though.
So it's just one more obstacle to defecate on while beating the Flyers.

And when doing a prediction, we like to think what one freak injury to a player would do to a team.

If Crosby gets hurt for an extended time, the Pens could stay afloat.
Same thing with Jagr getting injured.

Imagine if Simon Gagne went down.
But then again, to stay afloat, you first have to be above the water.

5. [nyi.png]
Whatev.
Our good friend at Patrick at [ DriveforFive.com ] wrote us a nice little preview.
And we were going to use the whole thing. But all the other team bloggers from the Atlantic didn't do jack for us, so it blew up the whole thing.

You can read Patrick's take here:
[ Islanders season Preview ]

People were coming and going during the offseason like Nassau Coliseum was a crackhouse.

The Islanders could surprise people this year if Shooting Puck and Saving Goalie answer to Ted Nolan's dances.

But honestly.
If you are a Islanders fan, can you really trust Ted Nolan?

WARNING
This next picture may alter your life.


YESSSSSSSSSSSSS

We have saved this picture for a while.
Found it where else but Newcomer's site.

.............................................................................

NOTES
  • The Pens 105 points last year were inflated 16 points by beating up on the Flyers 8 times.
  • This is the final season of the 8 games against every divisional opponent era.
  • 12 of the last 13 games of the season are against Atlantic teams, or something like that.
  • We are tired of playing the Islanders 3 times over a 10-day span.
.......................................................................

And for one final time:



OPENING FACEOFF COUNTDOWN



The End.

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Go Pens

48 comments:

meecrofilm said...

i'm so freakin excited that i cant fall asleep. The pens are hurting my college GPA. and i don't give a shit. Sid and Malkin are gonna have freakin monster years. I'm also lookin at Crusher to exceed expectations, and I'm bettin' on Malone surprising a few people as well.

Bring on Carolina. My prediction: Pens with 4-3, with Staalsy scoring the late winner in regulation after pooping on his brother. Can't fucking wait.

Nathan said...

The Hurricanes fans who show up at the RBC Center tomorrow will likely be pissed, but it's not Carolina's home opener. The Canes and Habs played in Raleigh last night. Getting in as many home games as possible there before they get evicted for two weeks for the State Fair.

Montreal looked grotesquely bad out there at times last night, and Carolina has no offense (the second goal seemed really flukey). Pens 4, Hurricanes 2. Cheers.

Elly said...

Whooo, gives me chills! I feel like I should clap. Either that or print that Nolan picture out and frame it.

pensblogadam said...

good call, nathan.

that'll be fixed shortly.

ac

snoopyjode said...

hmmm. maybe sid stood on a box for that pic. :)

solid work as usual, gentlemen. this week is dragging!! oh, but what a reward we'll get this weekend. this is indeed the most wonderful time of the year!!!

Loser Chris said...

Downie was suspended for a month by the AHL.

Korn said...

Who knew seeing Johan Hedberg would give me chills? Seems like "Eye of the Tiger" should be playing at the end of that post...

adam said...

PFC Louden Downie has been suspended a month by the NHL. [ TSN ]
That'll work out to probably 10 games, maybe?
Compared to the NHL's 20-game suspension.
What a joke.

i think u mean ahl

Spencemo said...

MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOSSE! Sorry, couldn't resist...

Nathan said...

Okay, reality confirms perception: the Southeast Division really gets hosed with Versus' cable exclusivity. The 25 Carolina fans who couldn't get tickets to last night's game got cheated out of being able to watch the Canes' home opener last night. I ended up watching that game last night, but Center Ice carried the RDS broadcast, something they only do when there's no English-language broadcast available. Although at one point, the announcers did welcome "Everyone watching across the continent and all the Hurricanes fans watching on NHL Center Ice," (in English), and then went right back to calling the game in French. It was kind of jarring, because it came completely out of nowhere.

On another note, there's something really awesome about watching a Francophone broadcast of a hockey game. Basically as long as you know the phrase "e la but" you're good, but it really forces you to pay attention if you're like me and don't speak a word of French.

ac said...

wow, we shit the bed today.

thanks for finding this stuff, guys.

Barrasso35 said...

That picture of Ted Nolan unreal. Leave it to Ron Newcomer.

Drop the god damn puck.

canaanregulatesblog said...

all i have to say is...

i'll have the i-tali-an combo!

BOOM!

Anonymous said...

staff- you're really in midseason form. if people aren't passing out from these posts, the pens don't define their lives.
great showing.
go pens.

canaanregulatesblog said...

oh snap...

did the the nhl.com frozen moment get axed? or am i an idiot? or both?

Hooks Orpik said...

Malkin is all business in that picture, gotta love it.

That Ted Nolan picture is the reason I have developed a tic.

I'm setting a over/under as 17:00 will be on the clock when Gary Roberts destroys a Hurricane along the boards.

Almost time....

Loser Chris said...

I'll take the under Hooks.

Anonymous said...

Thank you staff for getting me through a boring ass summer. GO PENS!

wilsmith said...

Call me crazy, but does Malkin look like Bob Geldoff in that picture?
A young Bob Geldoff.

Jonny V said...

"Shooting Puck and Saving Goalie" U guys put little shit like that in your posts that crack me the hell up...

I knew it would be Paek and Moose as the logical choices for the countdown. I am so friggin' happy that it's finally here.

Malkinian said...

Reading a post from you guys is like the high school kid infatuated w/ his new girlfriend. Everyday there's something new that brings a smile to my face. You guys got me through the offseason. I havta say I'm a bit surprised that I didn't see a pic of 2 Sens fans celebrating Heatley's resigning. Let's Drop The Puck!!!

GameDayChat said...

Thanks for the plug today, guys! Might want to mention something about registering for an account before the game starts. I also need some moderators for the room if anyone is interested, send me some mail.

Even though I'll actually be at the game in Raleigh, you're all welcome at the site for Friday's opener.

Hoping to see as many Pens fans there as I did last year when I went.

Christina said...

wow, i totally missed the trib's photoshop job when i saw that pic yesterday. if that's the mark of a good photoshop, then well done, trib graphics dept.

i started grinning like a butcher's dog (time to add the lange-isms back into my everyday vocab) when i saw the Moooooose!!! the season's finally here!!!

GO PENS!!!

karri said...

Congrats on being #3!
1. Off Wing Opinion (eh)
2. James Mirtle (whatever)
3. The Pens Blog

Oh...
Breaking News! John Fedko reported that "Big Ben had his foot stepped on during last weekend's game and it's still hurting him!" and "...btw, the Penguins start their season Friday night."

Fedko

Anonymous said...

No Wendell Young?

tecmo_bowl_bo_jackson said...

Don't know if anyone said this or not, but Recchi, Gonch and Roberts are alternative caps.

Ashley said...

Damn, I wish the games tomorrow and Saturday were being broadcast on TV. I'm heading home for Thanksgiving and I have stupid dial-up internet at home (yes, we live in the stone ages in my house) so I can't listen to the game on internet radio. I get to celebrate the start of the season by watching Montreal and Toronto on HNIC (should be a good game, even though they are both pretty crappy teams)

I'll be relying on you guys to give some sort of a recap...anything...to get my Pens fix this weekend. Please?

Stanley P. Kachowski said...

I'm boycotting the rest of Thursday and Friday 12:00AM - 7:00PM.

Get here already, damnit.

twinkie said...

Would it be possible to move the comments link to the top of each post so that people who like to read the comments several times a day don't have to scroll through the post each time?

Anonymous said...

twinkie, i love the idea. i do the same thing about 5 times a day at work. Pens 5 Hurricanes 2

andrew13 said...

i've been busy as hell and haven't been keeping up on commenterblog, but directv has free centre ice for a month i guess. it's sweet as hell. i was watching tsn's leafs/sens game last night, then switching to the habs game in french... french commercials are funny as hell.

MummRaTheEverLiving said...

Geno does kind of resemble a young Bob Geldoff. Pens marketing needs to get on that...

"Everytime Malkin scores a goal, the Penguins will provide a meal to 5 hungry africans!"

snoopyjode said...

gary roberts can quit worrying about feeling like he's playing in may...

stokes said...

i tingle with anticipation everytime i think about spending this weekend with the Pittsburgh Penguins.

Anonymous said...

damn it was a long summer, but you guys kept things interesting as always. good to see everyone getting back in the swing of things, seems like a lot of bandwagoners are emerging this year. seeing alot of jerseys/shirts/hats around campus, can only wonder how many of them supported the team before last season. 26hours=game on.
Let's Go Pens.

-Eric

Ryan said...

canaan - the frozen moment is still there, scroll down a bit, theres a link for it right below the feature stories, and above the points leaders.

solid redesign on nhl.com, always thought it was cluttered last year. Much more organized now. Love the game schedule across the top.

-----

staff - thanks for keeping our interest all offseason. there's nothing like reading about and watching videos of the pens (and crazy music videos) all summer.

wilsmith said...

Yeah, I'm jacked.

I got screwed hard out of tickets for the home opener (Wah wah wah, I know), so I'll be watching from home, but still... jacked.

Anonymous said...

RYAN, many thanks for pointing that out.


-CANAAN

wilsmith said...

I love Sid and all, but that kid's gotta work on his serious face for all these photoshoots.

I've given up on Fleury. That guy can't not smile.

Davy D said...

Alternate captains, BoJax. Alternative captains went in the 80s.

Solid pic of GR: http://media.canada.com/31a8f7dd-65a5-4524-b9b0-0aa93d9b3b89/041107gary.jpg

Great preview Staff.
Go Pens

Davy D said...

Another pic of Gary chillin'
http://media.canada.com/gallery/dose_topgod/070621god_bruce.jpg

Oh, & whoever suggested moving the commentblog link to the top of the post . . . brilliant!

Jonny V said...

Was listening to The X today, and the DJ quoted a story broke by Ellis Cannon yesterday that Sid and Recchi both bought luxury suites for the home opener on saturday, and they donated them to two different children's charities.

Class. Fucking. Acts.


And here's DJ Gallo's guide to the hockey season, comparing the NHL with the "other major sports." Trust me, it's a good read.


LESS THAN ONE FUCKING DAY LEFT!!!111!! (insert that weird noise Howard Dean made at the end of his rant in '04)

Lloyd said...

dont know if anyone knows this...

NHL Center Ice has a free preview (not sure how long) just watched the sharks force OT with 10 secs left in the 3rd

wilsmith said...

I don't want to be a dick or anything, but hasn't rex been doing that for years?

It's awesome, but why is it just now becoming a story in Pittsburgh?

CaucasianInvasion said...

"Well then I guess there's only one thing left to do"

"What's that?"

"Win the whole fucking thing."

"Yeah...."

"YEAH!"

Anonymous said...

Guys -

You really should put up the new season headshots for the Pens leaders; they're up on the site.

Gotta get the house in order for opening night!

Anonymous said...

has anyone seen the website that is the first result for 'gary roberts' on google? umm....yea...

Hooks Orpik said...

"I find I’m so excited I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head.

I think it’s the excitement only a Penguins fan can feel. A Pens fan at the start of a long journey whose conclusion is uncertain. I hope they can make it to the Finals. I hope to see Lord Stanley and shake his hand. I hope the Gary Roberts is as dominant as he has been in my dreams......I hope."

PS: it hasn't been said yet, and there probably won't be another relevant time to say so, so RIP Ivan Hlinka. A great hockey mind. A good man, and a good coach.

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