Friday, August 31, 2007

SportingNews Loves The Pens

Hockey media outlets are starting to print their preview magazines that gullible jerk-offs like us buy for $8.

The Sporting News' hockey preview is what these magazine are all about, though.
You won't see a better collection of stats and crap.
Unbelievable pictures.

Sid is the logical choice for the regional cover.

Who do they say is winning the Cup this season?

Of course, with Sid and how the Pens did last year, they are a playoff mainstay for years to come.
But winning the Cup this season?

We live in Pittsburgh, so we can't look at this 100% objectively.

Does the rest of the NHL see the Pens as being this good?

There is one problem with the Sporting News preview.
Something happened to the page where the Ottawa Senators preview should be.

You turn the page...
All you get is this.


NHLToL released some Vancouver jersey concepts.

That is a sick jersey. Case closed.

And for another definition of "sick"...

Concept artist was on a drug that no one even knows about.


Now, for some legit Pens jersey news:

Remember, FaceoffFactor broke this before anyone.

They will be unveiling them up at Pittsburgh Mills.[ Pittsburgh ]

And also, as we suspected, there will be a patch commemorating the 40th year of the Pens franchise.

Can anyone remember if the Penguins wore the 30th anniversary patch at all during the 1997-1998 season?
So far, Gore has not produced the desired results.

The Pens may try to nab some casual fans by preying on the minds of dumb Steeler fans with a big XL on the patch, to remind people of the Super Bowl.
It's how the mind works.

We'd cover the unveiling of the Pens 40th-anniversary patch, but we are as reliable as Jeff Serowik when it comes to breaking news.


The Edmonton Oilers are asking fans to donate their tickets to a November 24th game to Canadian troops. [ ]
Solid stuff.

Colonel Nathan R. Jessup, thoughts?

"Canada has an army? I'll Code Red all over your mom's face buddy."


House M.D. has revived [ The Guins Blog ] at the last minute.
It narrowly escapes a visit to the gallows with an August 29th post.

A great guide to Fantasy hockey. [ Barry Melrose Rocks ]

A nice, easy breakdown of the Steeler game in quarters. [ PSAMP]

Was is just us, or was Brian St. Pierre trying to get hurt?

If you got 50 bucks, why not spend it on a Milan Kraft jersey? [ Craig's List ]

Two mere observations:
  • It is hard to believe Milan Kraft knew how to write.
  • Who was dumb enough to actually buy a Milan Kraft shirt.

Day number:

We started the athlete numbers at 37 on the way up, so we can use pictures again.
We would've used Jerome Bettis.
But we don't support drug dealers.


canaanregulatesblog said...

for employees that rely on your grammar, you used "would of" when discussing the 'daily number.'

im going to strap dynamite to my grammar chest right meow.


canaanregulatesblog said...

quit being a critical douche, canaan.

Matt said...

here's my red wings concept logo:

clicky clicky

Anonymous said...

Is anyone talking about the rumors that we offered something for some amount of years to Danny Markov?

Kenny Melvin said...

How can you even take the sporting news seriously when they still haven't even update the Penguins main logo yet? What a joke.


Quit being a critical douche, canaan

Brian said...

Awesome concept Matt. Clearly that should have been the Wings' new jersey.

Teej said...

In the Barnaby pic, is that Lyle Odelein he's scuffling with? Totally forgot about him until that pic came up... he was a Pen for 15 minutes.

Loser Chris said...

Yeah, that is Lyle. Thanks for bringing up his time with the Pens. Why don't you mention Marty McSorely while you're at it?

Hooks Orpik said...

``Matt Barnaby, yesss! It's too bad his wife made him retire. Concussions, schmacussions.

``I think the Pens will have high expectations this year from the outside media. After all, with the strides made last year, plus a full season with savvy vets added like Roberts and Sydor and more experience for the young core, I expect most will 'predict' Pittsburgh to be the class of the East. Ottawa and NYR seem to be the other pre-season favorites.

``Anon, I don't buy the Markov rumors. They're coming from poopontheburgh, who's also "reported" a lot of stuff. I think if Shero would have wanted Markov, he wouldn't have waited 2 months. Shero's crushing on Letang, so I think he's comfortable adding him to the other 5 regulars (Gonch, Whitney, Orpik, Sydor and Eaton) and then having Scuderi, Nasreddine and Mike Weaver for depth/injuries.

Korn said...

Every time I see Mike Weaver's name I think Mike Seaver.

Hopefully he shows up at camp with a cheesy leather jacket and starts referring to Whitney as "Boner".

Anonymous said...

"Who was dumb enough to actually buy a Milan Kraft shirt."

Maybe they got it from a "Shirts off our backs" night from when Kraft was on the team? After all, somebody out there now has a signed Kwiatkowski Penguins jersey!

snoopyjode said...

awww, good ol' matthew barnaby. how can you NOT love a guy that laughs and sticks his tongue out at a man with whom he was just fighting while being dragged by the referees to the penalty box? good times. :)

Anonymous said...

i think we should do playoff predictions now and see if anyone can predict it...

Mark said...

It really bothers me that you guys have the Pens at the bottom of the standings. Obviously, we haven't played a game yet, but put the Pens at the top of the standings since that's where they'll be throughout the season.

Dwayne said...

Okay, so I didn't know a lot about Matthew Barnaby (yeah, I'm a bit of a new hockey fanatic. everybody has to start some time, right?)

Anyway, I went to youtube some videos of him, especially if I could find any of him sticking his tongue out at a dude as he's going to the box.

The very first video on youtube is, and forever will be, an ultimate classic.

barnaby + snow. I seriously couldn't stop laughing. Good times. Real good times.

Spencemo said...

Uh, Mark, I'm going to go out on a limb here and say that I think the division standings listing they have here is in alphabetical order. Which, puts them at the bottom.

Dobber said...

What a great Lyle Odelein pic, his crooked nose was a classic.

Hooks Orpik said...

Dwayne, the best part of that incident is Barnaby wasn't even expected to play that game. He legitimately had a painful hip pointer injury and when he was down it was not a fake, because he got laid out. Then after taking it to Snow, he had to fight Brind'Amour for 2 minutes. Incredible.

For a dude who showed up to his junior team's tryout at 140 pounds and literally had to fight his way onto the roster, he carved out an amazing career.

Ming the Merciless said...

I have fond memories of Barnaby calling Odelein Cornelius from Planet of the Apes

Jeff said...

I second the playoff predictions.

mark said...

Spencemo, this isn't alphabetical order blog, this is pensblog. At no time do the freakin' flyers, rangers, and devils belong above the Pens in any standings, except maybe level of gayness.


We are in no way affiliated with the Pittsburgh Penguins of the National Hockey League.

In accordance with the Fair Use Copyright Law, The Pensblog uses logos and registered trademarks of the National Hockey League to convey our criticism and inform the public.

Photos on The Pensblog are used without permission but do not interfere with said owner's profit.

If you own a specific image on this site and want it removed, please e-mail us ( and we will be happy to oblige.