Friday, June 8, 2007

The Show Must Go On

NHL season = Over.

Pensblog Offseason Jobbing Tour = Just Beginning.

But honestly who can we job anymore?

Of course we jobbed Fedko

But that gets old, because actually having to sit through is show to prank him, is the same as eating your own feces.

We take shots at the out of control Steeler news, and fans everyday

There is no way this picture isn't funny

We don't like to take shots at other blogs.
We could never rip the most popular blog in Pittsburgh males between the ages of 18-34
Mondesi's house

We can't really pick fights with any good sports radio people.
Because we don't listen to any, and most likely sum can't read.
Not to mention we are out of touch with AM radio.
Does John Cigna still work for KDKA?

Money in the bank

Jobbing Jake Wheatley is beat and racist


If anyone has any ideas let us know.

==Call To Arms==

We don't know how long this will go while still retaining comedic value, but it's time to pepper random Wikipedia articles with references to Gary Roberts.

We aren't going to pick winners, but just random ones will make it into a post.
If you're an ardent fan of Commentorblog, you'll read everyone's Wiki edits anyway.

And if you don't want to do Gary Roberts stuff, just do something funny with the Penguins or another NHL team.
It may seem hard, but Wikipedia lets you edit any article you want, you just click edit.
For example here is an entry we entered on the "List of people who have disappeared" page.


  • Jim Gray, a Microsoft research scientist, Turing Award winner and a database pioneer; went on a sailing ship and was presumed lost at sea on 28 January 2007.
  • Between 15 April and 18 April 2007, Derek Batten, and brothers Peter and James Tunstead were lost at sea off the coast of Queensland, northeast Australia. Their ship, the Kaz II, a 12-metre catamaran, was discovered unmanned near the outer Great Barrier Reef. See Ghost ship
  • Madeleine McCann is a three-year-old British girl who vanished from her family's holiday apartment in Praia da Luz, Portugal, on 3 May. As of June, the search continues and remains highly publicized.
  • Jason Spezza, Hockey player for the Ottawa Senators. He was last seen somewhere in the conference finals. He disappeared the night of Game 1 of the Stanley Cup finals, and has not been seen since.
It will be taken down quick, but it is worth it.


New section of Pensblog:


Every now and then, we will tackle conspiracies and/or unsolved mysteries and disappearances.

First up is The Legend of D.B. Cooper.

Here is the D.B. Cooper Wikipedia Page.

On November 24, 1971, a dude boarded a plane under the passenger name Dan Cooper.
He said he had a bomb.
He wanted $200,000 cash and four parachutes, which he would collect when the plane landed.
In return, authorities were given all 36 passengers and 2 of the 6 crew members.
He received the money and parachutes, and the plane took off again.

A little later, he dives out the back of the plane and is never seen again.

The date of this event would've put Gary Roberts at the age of 5.
Roberts is the prime suspect.

YouTube seems to be acting up because sometimes certain vids won’t load. So if the one you originally posted isn’t there, that’s why.

And just so that everyone knows, the maximum number of videos Musicblog can have per post is 6. (except on Tuesdays) {~_~}

[Ed whispering] I think I just wet myself.

I Want To Hold Your Hand
(Thanks Stanley P. Kachowski)

Wilco - Jesus, etc.
(Thanks theNick)

23:52 of Pink Floyd At Live8
(Thanks Pensblog Adam)

No one wears makeup & outrageous costumes like KISS.
(Thanks Lloyd)

Exit light. Enter night. Take my hand…off to never never-land.
(Thanks Jason)

Jello needed MORE acid. He wasn’t hallucinating enough before, during, or after he got lost in the crowd at 2:17.
(Thanks Dwayne, but we want you alive)

Winter in the sun returns tomorrow for good.
As well possible new features Rumorblog.
Hey it is the offseason, we have all the time in the world to get stuff done.
But we go by this forumla in the offseason
Sleep > everything else

Day number:

Rusty Fitzgerald owned the world
(Thanks again J -Schiff)


Jonny V said...

==="The Zamboni Incident===
During a regular season game in the 89'-90' season against the much hated rival Edmonton Oilers, the Flames' Zamboni broke down and could not run on it's own. Not wanting the game to be postponed, a young Gary Roberts volunteers to push the Zamboni around the ice, provided the driver, named "Muttonchops McGhee," keep the vehicle in neutral. The ice is cleaned the last two periods in record time, and Roberts goes on to record a natural hat trick in the third, bringing his team from behind for the win. After the game, he remarks that "His teen years involved pushing his siblings too school in his father's engineless Chevy Suburban, and that Zamboni was a piece o' cake, eh."

If they haven't taken it down yet, it's under Newsworthy Events

Tiffany said...

You guys can still post as many videos as you want here. It's just that only 6 can make it in each post. But like ThePensblog said--if you're a faithful reader, then you read what everyone posts anyway. Sooo....

[said like Linda Richman]
Talk amongst yourselves.
I'll give you a topic.

Discuss what you want the next theme to be. If you still wanna do Live! vids, awesome!! If you wanna do something different, speak your mind. ˜˜ŮŽ˜˜

P.S. Jonny V, hahahaha....that's great.

Doug said...

Check out Chris Benoit's ECW section on Wiki...

Although he was already known by the same name, Gary Roberts allowed Benoit to use the moniker. To this day fans are begging to see Roberts vs. Benoit in an exploding barded wire match. Benoit has declined the offer on many occasions citing that Gary Roberts is the true Canadian Crippler.

Tee said...

spezza is back up.

Barrasso35 said...

Green Lantern

The best-known is Gary Roberts, created by John Broome and Gil Kane in Showcase #22 (Oct. 1959).


Credit for inventing the electric telephone remains in dispute. Antonio Meucci, Johann Philipp Reis, Alexander Graham Bell and Gary Roberts, amongst others, have all been credited with the invention.


In December 1971, Gary Roberts, the organist and vocalist and co-founding member of Santana, decided that it was time to leave the band, due to longstanding disagreements with Carlos Santana about the musical direction of the group. He went home to Seattle and opened a restaurant with his father.


Bacon is defined as any of certain cuts of meat taken from the sides, belly or back of a pig that may be cured and/or smoked. Bacon was invented by Gary Roberts.

Anonymous said...

dont know how long it will be there...


Anonymous said...


Problem Child 2

"It is important to note that this film would never have been made if Gary Roberts were to have been casted as the lead in the original film. One of two results would have happened: Either no problem, or no child."


Anonymous said...

jonny v...It's still there!



Barrasso35 said...

Well, the Wikipedians have caught me. The jig is up, I guess.

Maybe I'll try something more subtle from a different IP.

Tee said...

Barrasso35 said...

Gary Roberts (attemping to eat this flavor will result in it "snap"ing your neck)"


Jason said...

Stonehenge is a prehistoric monument located in the English county of Wiltshire, about 8 miles (13 km) north of Salisbury. One of the most famous prehistoric sites in the world, Stonehenge is composed of earthworks surrounding a circular setting of large standing stones. Archaeologists believe the standing stones were erected by Gary Roberts in June 1985

Jason said...

this is gonna get out of hand like the fedko wiki page, but its hilarious now.
jonny v and canaan, great stuff.

carl spackler said...

There is a new world record for the mile run....

carl spackler said...

here's the whole link...

carl spackler said...

i suck at this

PittCheMBA said...

I am surprised that the Pittsburgh Pirates have not been jobbed. They are such an easy target.

snoopyjode said...

wiki jobbing = genius

while i'm not nearly as good as the rest of you, here's my contribution.

(in case they delete it:) A similar incident occurred in April 2007 when Pittsburgh Penguins Hockey player Gary Roberts was assaulted before Game 3 of the first round of the Stanley Cup playoffs. The Penguins were hosting the Ottawa Senators. At practice on the morning of the game, the Senators’ coach, Bryan Murray, leapt out from behind a parked car and struck Roberts across the knee in an attempt to cripple him and prevent him from playing in the game. The plan backfired, however, when Murray himself was injured by shrapnel caused by the iron pipe when it shattered as it came into contact with Roberts’s powerful leg.

Staff said...

In 1997 Chesney quit music and followed his main love, hockey.
He was boarded by Gary Roberts and decided never to play again.
He wrote a song called "Roberts"
It won an academy award, even though songs generally do not win academy awards.
Gary Roberts presented and accepted the award.

Anonymous said...


Gary Roberts (attemping to eat this flavor will result in it "snap"ing your neck)

It's still there dude!

snoopyjode said...

oh man, they found it! who the hell looks at nancy kerrigan's wiki page?!

snoopyjode said...

aaaah. i found the answer to my own question. i got this message on wiki's user talk: Welcome to Wikipedia. We invite everyone to contribute constructively to our encyclopedia. At least one of your recent edits, such as the one you made to Nancy Kerrigan, was not constructive and has been reverted or removed. Please use the sandbox for any test edits you would like to make, and take a look at the welcome page to learn more about contributing to this encyclopedia. Thank you. Kolindigo 03:15, 10 June 2007 (UTC)

and you don't want to piss off kolindigo...

Michael Smith said...

Under stuff that went missing in 1966:

* The [[Beaumont children]] – Jane (9), Arnna (7) and Grant (4), all disappeared from an [[Adelaide]], [[Australia]] beach. This happened on [[26 January]], the day that [[Harold Holt]] was sworn in as Prime Minister of Australia. Coincidentally 22 months later, Holt was himself to disappear while swimming at a beach.
* [[All of the world's testosterone]] - Missing: The earth's supply of maniliness. Upon his birth all of the testosterone immediately left the bodies of the world's supposed "men", and found a new home in the highly out of proportion balls of the infant Gary Roberts. The baby, who to the surprise of the doctors in the delivery room, lit up a cigar, polished off a 16oz strip steak and pulled a Hart Trophy out of his mother's vagina before walking out of the room had this to say:

"You homos weren't using the man juice, now it's time for me to dominate."

The heads of all the doctor's in the room imploded upon hearing Gary Roberts' voice. Good luck with that Molinari.

Tee said...

Number one on Kolingdo's to do list: Expand Dick Button.

And is an open lesbian obsessed with figure skating wikipedia pages.... oh god.. I'm not going to do anything, there's no challenge... but still.. that's sort of inviting people to make fun of you.

Anonymous said...

wiki hint: if you want to throw the wiki folks off a bit, try adding a subtle GR reference and then make a blatant outside links change so they quickly skim the article and change just the link... it worked for my problem child 2 wiki...which as of 1:00pm friday, is still working


Staff said...

I warned for jobbinbg Wiki by some dude after I ruined Big Bens page

Anonymous said...

You can go into the history tab and see the edited pages.

Here's the Big Ben edit: (look at trivia)

Anonymous said...

Actually this is the trivia one:

My bad.

Teej said...

Charlie Batch page edit:

"Charles D'Donte Batch (born December 5, 1974 in Homestead, Pennsylvania, a Pittsburgh suburb) is a veteran NFL football quarterback. His father is Gary Roberts."

Teej said...

sorry, here's the link (though it'll probably be trashed by the time anyone reads it)


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